The Masjid

Across the United States masajid (mosques) have expanded in physical size, improved mass communication via websites and social media accounts, begun to offer live-streaming for Friday khutbas (sermons) online, and have improved women’s prayer areas. But in recent times, many imams have left their posts, leaving communities and trend followers to speculate and ask, “Why?” Was it the imam’s ego or a salary dispute or are they just becoming too impatient?

No, this wave of resignations is a symptom of a greater problem: while incoming imams treat their position as a profession by becoming increasingly qualified, the masjid board has not taken the same strides in becoming trained in non-profit management. Those who run the masjid and supervise the imams’ affairs are still volunteers with, generally speaking, no expertise on how to manage non-profit organizations.   As a result, the operational structure of the masjid is not equipped to manage the imam, the other employees, or to draft and execute long-term plans with a vision for the changing needs of the community. Masjid reform must take place to not only bring stability by retaining their imams but by also allowing for future growth, and attracting Muslims of all backgrounds and ages.

To analyze the surge in recent Imam’s resignations from masajid large and small, it is important to understand the dynamics between the masjid board, the imam, and the community.

The Board

A typical board is elected for a specified number of years, where elected members take on various responsibilities: Chairperson, President, Financial Officer, Secretary, and so on.  The staff of the masjid goes on to include the imam, sometimes multiple imams or religious directors, administrative staff, and other support employees. At the end of the day, all of the above staff report to the board.

Boards usually manage the day-to-day affairs of the masjid. These duties and responsibilities are noble and to be commended. The question to be asked remains: If a community is made up of hundreds or even thousands of congregants, what is the guarantee that the most qualified people are elected to manage the masjid? Those five, ten or fifteen that are chosen to represent their masjid, are they equipped to understand all of the needs and nuances of their constituents? Are they trained in management or in human resources so as to interface with the imam and the other staff in the most effective manner?

The masjid is, by definition, a non-profit organization, and rarely do the doctors, engineers, and business people who are voted onto the board have backgrounds in non-profit management. While these volunteers are to be commended for their countless hours of dedication and sacrifice, it is time the community recognizes that the non-profit organization that we call the masjid cannot thrive on the limited expertise of individuals from random professions. These realms are completely different. A multitude of certifications and degrees are offered in various aspects of non-profit management, so individuals with the above expertise should serve on the board.

Allah the Most Merciful tells us in the Qur’an in the second half of the ayah (verse) below: “…And ask those who have knowledge, if you do not know.”

Surah Al Nahl 16:43

The Imam

The same level of expectations in terms of expertise is also necessary for the Imam. An Imam should have a grasp of the Arabic language, have certified training as a religious scholar which includes understanding the complex sciences of tafsir (Qur’anic exegesis), hadith (narration), and Islamic jurisprudence (fiqh). In addition, many imams have supplementary degrees in social sciences, history, Middle-Eastern studies, etc. The ability to connect with the community and to understand its needs are crucial in supporting the diverse make-up of the masjid’s constituents.

The demands upon the Imam are very high. Supporting the community in times of distress such as providing counseling on marriage, divorce, domestic violence, death, drug use, suicide, etc. are just a few of the Imam’s responsibilities. The imam also shares in the celebrations of the community, conducting weddings and attending aqeeqahs (birth celebrations) and ameens. In addition, the imam represents not only the masjid, but the greater Muslim community at political events, interfaith circles, and in social justice arenas.

The imam sacrifices his time with his own family with the intention of serving the community and pleasing Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He). This is not a position of wealth or glamour.

The Board, The Community, The Imam: An Unbalanced Equation

The dynamics between the board, the masjid’s constituents, and the imam has many nuances. Let us explore these relationships:

The Community-Board Relationship

Often times the board is an ear to the constituents’ wants, needs, and likes/dislikes. This is a healthy relationship that helps to ensure that the board is indeed representing their community. One of the pitfalls, however, is when the ear is filled with opinions from friends or acquaintances of a few board members that become magnified as a major issue. “Where was the imam at this time?” or “Why was the prayer time changed?” or “I didn’t like the khutba.” Imagine if only friends or acquaintances get the ear of the board, and they happen to be those with complaints that do not reflect the overall effectiveness of the imam. The result would be a skewed impression of how well the Imam performs.

Do other community members know when and how to contact the board if they have a concern or a word of praise? What about when there is a conflict with the imam? Is there a mediation process involving professional mediators or a group from the community? Does the community know about problems before the imam feels compelled to resign? Regrettably, the answers to these questions are often “no.”

The Board-Imam Relationship

The Board, and most often the Chairperson or President, in particular, is the imam’s boss. In some masajid, imams as employees are given formal, written evaluations. How are these evaluations made? Are there general surveys sent out to the community after prayer or via email? Who evaluates the board? No one does. The community at large does not know the details of individual board member actions. Written evaluations are a one-way, subjective process, in which, out of all the employees of the masjid, only the already over-burdened imam is scrutinized.

The board has by-laws that protect the masjid and the board itself, but who is there to protect the imam? If there is a conflict between the board and the imam, who is there to defend or represent him?   A meeting with the board can turn into a five-on-one intimidating process, with the Imam being the “one.”  And psychologically speaking, it is natural for any group of individuals working together to develop “group thinking” where it is difficult to understand any reasoning other than that of the group, or in this case, the board. As a religious director or imam, who is already burdened with the problems of the community, and of society at large, he has the added responsibility of being his own lawyer when negotiating for his rights at the masjid.

A position at the masjid, as previously mentioned, is not one that people enter into for glory. Thus there needs to be an inherent level of trust in the imam, especially after years of proven performance. When hours at the masjid are being questioned, it is a sign of an inherent problem – a lack of trust and/or of an understanding of what it means to be an imam.   Expecting the imam to spend his over 60-hour work week at the masjid is not practical. As one great imam and scholar stated, “A five minute reminder can take five hours of preparation.” Aside from off-masjid activities, countless hours of preparation for speeches and khutbas (Friday sermons) are spent at home. In addition, fielding phone calls, and tending to crises of the community at individuals’ homes or at the hospital are also time spent away from the masjid.

The Imam – Community Relationship

The imam deals with various constituents either through private counseling sessions, or through general contact at the masjid.   Although the imam has a close relationship with the community, most of its constituents never contact the board about their satisfaction with the imam. Instead, most feedback regarding the imam comes from only a handful of individuals with complaints about the minutia of masjid affairs. As a result, what true knowledge does the board have of the community’s satisfaction with the imam?

Conclusion

There is a disconnect between the immense relationships that the imam has within the community he serves and the board’s perception of the imam’s performance. As a result of this disparity, the board is readily willing to exert their power in enforcing their micromanaging demands without being mindful of the ensuing effect their unreasonable pressure will have on the imam. Despite the imam’s love for the community, he finds himself having to choose between continuing his post at the masjid and saving his own sanity and that of his family. In addition, the board may be shocked by a resignation, yet no consideration was given to the fact that imams are human and there is only so much difficulty in dealing with the board that the imam can handle before becoming soured to the system.

And that’s the point: one can endure temporary problems, differences of opinion and conflicts arising from within the masjid. However, when the religious director or imam understands that the system will never change, that is, the system of having a new, volunteer boss every one to two years who has no experience in non-profit management, who is going to come down with their own style of management, with their own opinions about what the imam should be doing, it is difficult to sit tight and think, “one day this may change.”

I encourage a healthy discussion between community members, masjid officials and our religious leaders to come to a practical solution. May Allah (swt) guide us all and make the masjid a place welcome for all, including the imams.

(c) Rehan Shaikh

Originally posted in September 2012.

At the risk of aging myself, in the 90’s, the term “unplugged” referred to a show where artists musically entertained a small audience without the aid of electric instruments.  These days however, when families are encouraged to go “unplugged” they are persuaded to spend time together free of “electronic distractions” or as my older brother, an electrical engineer, says, “e-distractions,” for short.  Such distractions include the myriad of miniature instant gratification devices otherwise known as Nintendo DS’s, iPods, tablets, phones, not to mention larger distractions, like television, gaming consoles such as Wii, Xbox, etc., and the classic home computer.  We all know the merits of quality family time on a real-time basis, but the question is: how?

First, it is important to understand the ramifications of the entire family’s increased relationship with electronics.  Studies show that family bonds are weakening since members are spending more screen time and less face time.  Children and adults alike are losing the ability to engage in small talk and are gaining an increased apathy towards others.  An increased desire for visual stimulation and a decreased attention span are also compelling reasons to push for familial electronic time-outs.  Feelings of detachment of family members from one another leads to an increased reliance on comfort in superficial “e-relationships” and fleeting moments of gratification from Facebook posts, game console victories, and endless text conversations.

To console those who enjoy the above-mentioned activities, this article is not intended to condemn them.  Instead, it is meant to point out the importance of giving our technological toys a “time-out” and to tune-in to the family on a consistent basis.  The beauty of this concept is that every family, regardless of its size, can custom make a “reconnect plan” of their own.

For example, consider setting guidelines for the family, which include times where technology use is not allowed.  Such times can include family meals, a specific hour in the evening, or better yet, an entire day of the week.  For some of you, the mere thought of spending more than a few minutes away from your tablet or phone causes increased anxiety.  Sadly enough, this is now documented as a new disorder called “cell phone separation anxiety disorder,” where sufferers experience increased anxiety if they are away from their phones.  Yes, separation from instant gratification devices can be painful, but like lower primates, we can be trained to return to our natural e-distraction free state.  We have to re-learn basic skills like getting over boredom, engaging with others in a meaningful conversation, touching dirt and looking for bugs, and even having to talk to our parents’ out-of-town guests or long lost relatives.

Now, you may ask, how can we accomplish such a feat when toddlers, teens, and adults have become inseparable from their various screens?  First, give before you take away.  A classic concept in discipline is to replace an undesirable habit with a desirable one.  Simply said, provide fun alternatives for your family.  I have heard parents complain that their children only want to play on their electronic devices all day long.  Yet these same parents do not spend the time to take their children to the park, play a board game with them, let alone purchase such games, or even make the effort to engage their family members in an interesting discussion.

Below are some easy, family re-connect ideas.  But be forewarned, you will receive resistance from at least some of your family members.  Even the adults!  One key to the success of Operation Unplug and Re-Connect is to first discuss with your family guidelines to be followed.  Come up with a Re-connect plan that outlines how often you wish to have family time, e-distraction free.  For example, smaller or younger families may wish to have such times once a day.  Busier families, on the other hand may be content with a once-a-week schedule.  Next, have your family discuss activities that at least most members can agree upon.

Re-Connect Ideas

• Plan a family camping trip (a Mulla absolute favorite!).
• Go for a picnic at the beach or park and pack everyone’s favorite treat.
• Go outdoors and discover your surroundings. See who can find the most living things in 5 minutes.
• Engage your family in a discussion (if you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?).
• Go for a walk (some family members need more of a temptation like walking to an ice-cream or coffee shop).
• Play a board game.
• Look at family photos and reminisce.
• Divide and conquer if necessary: Play ball with some and play building blocks with others.

The bottom line is adding meaningful family quality time to our life, minus the electronic devices.  We would see healthier home lives and more well-rounded members of the community.  Changing familial habits is not easy, but well-worth it.  Unplug, re-connect, be patient, and enjoy.

To some Muslims, the words “Islamic school” immediately conjure negative connotations: backwards mentality, lower standards of education, strict supervision, unprofessional attitude, and so on. In fact, even supporters of Islamic schools for younger children would shun the idea of sending a middle-schooler or even a high-schooler to an Islamic school, saying, “I want to expose my child to the real world.” This article is written in response to the aforementioned points.

Offering “Real World” Experience in an Islamic Environment

There is a misconception that sending your child to an Islamic school completely alienates them from the rest of society. In reality, Islamic schools function just as public schools do, but offer the safety and comfort to children that is much-needed during their formative years. What part of sending our children to an Islamic school takes them out of the “real world?” Could it be our own subconscious feelings of inferiority that cause us to feel this way?

Shedding the “Mom and Pop” Image

Many critics of Islamic schools are locked in a time warp when most schools were run as family businesses.  Today, not only are many schools run by credentialed principals and administrators, but they also only hire credentialed teachers. In addition, many schools undergo a grueling evaluation process to become nationally accredited, eliminating the potential for sub-standard educational practices. The bar has been raised years ago to meet the community’s expectations and demands for quality education as well as a healthy, spiritual environment.

Developing a Positive Identity

In a book titled, “The Worried Child,” author Paul Foxman, PhD, addresses the issue of a lack of a religious/ethnic identity as a source of anxiety in children (p 94). The author also mentions that children who belong to a religious minority can feel “out of place, misunderstood, or even ostracized by their peers” when there are few or no other children of their religion in the same school. While some public schools have a sizable Muslim population, students may still feel the overwhelming effects of being in the minority. Foxman’s statement points to a positive aspect of sending our children to Islamic schools. There is a clear contribution to the positive development of a child when they have a strong sense of belonging. In addition, another study on identity and mental health states that belonging to and understanding one’s identity promotes an overall sense of well-being (see Erikson, 1968; Marcia, 1966).

Although understanding and feeling comfortable with one’s identity can be accomplished outside of an Islamic school, sending one’s child to an Islamic school can establish these feelings as part of a holistic approach. While children learn about Qur’an, its language, and the history of Islam, children also get to partake in Muslim celebrations and understand special events en masse, as part of a larger group. In this way, the child who attends an Islamic school will tend to develop positive self-esteem in a natural setting–one that does not seem forced or artificial.

Providing a Healthier Environment

Oftentimes, parents feel that by fifth or sixth grade, their children have received enough education in a Muslim environment, and so they want to send them to a public school, specifically to adapt to the “real world.” While Islamic schools do not shield children from the negative aspects of popular culture, there is a clear difference in the overall environment one’s child remains in for eight hours of school every day.

Those of us who attended public middle and high schools growing up can attest to the strong culture of dating, peer pressure to drink, to try drugs, to attend Homecoming and Prom, and so on. Despite being one of two Muslims in the entire school, I had an overall positive school experience. Nevertheless, the choice to constantly reject all the above was, at times, overwhelming.

To prepare our children for college and the workforce, we feel the need to ensure that our children interact with the “outside world” for experience. However, the years from middle school to high school feature the greatest hormonal changes. Being surrounded by scantily-clad students and couples of all types in extremely intimate situations is a very common, everyday occurrence in public high schools.

Increasing Pressures in a Sexualized World

Here’s something to consider: why knowingly provide an environment where a teenager is inundated with such temptations, if a viable Islamic school is a feasible option? With the popularity of Facebook and the ease of creating an online alter-ego, and the increasing pressure to have sex, to question one’s sexual identity, coupled with a teenager’s increasing hormonal changes, why not alleviate this pressure by sending your child to an institution that encourages and teaches the complete opposite?

While some may say, “well, get used to it,” let us instead realize that the middle and high school years are as intense as no other period in a student’s life. College campuses do have similar issues, but not to the same extent as in high school.  In addition, peer pressure is more avoidable in college, as students have a wealth of peers to choose from and class schedules are varied and staggered. Furthermore, in terms of their development, many students are more mature in college than in their earlier teenage years.

The Prophetic Example

Finally, let us look at the example of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (peace be upon him) on this last point.  Amina, Prophet Muhammad’s mother, made the effort to send her son to be raised in the desert, where the environment was more pure. Times have changed, but the idea of sending our children to a successful Islamic school to protect them should still be seen as positive and not negative.

Once during the Prophet’s youth, he had wanted to attend a wedding in Mecca with some other boys to see what such a festivity would be like. Just outside the place, Prophet Muhammad ﷺ could hear music and dancing. Before he entered, he suddenly felt tired and decided to sit. He fell asleep and did not wake up until the next morning. If there were any person who should keep up-to-date with what is going on in society, so that he may know how to give da`wah (to invite others to the path of Allah) or so that he could understand his people, it would be Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. Yet, Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exhalted is He) chose to prevent him from attending this event for his own protection.

Conclusion

After all is said, it is time to shed our old views on Islamic schools and take a fresh look at what they have to offer. As a mother of four children who went to four different Islamic schools since 2005 (the change of schools being due to moving), it is my experience that these schools provide quality education within a safe, moral environment. Are Islamic schools perfect? No, but do the benefits far outweigh the negatives, contributing to an overall positive, spiritual and educational experience? Yes.

I know now that I did not fully understand or appreciate the true meaning of my response.

Allah (swt) knows best, but perhaps I too, was to be tested so that I could begin to appreciate Allah’s infinite Mercy.  Just a few days ago I was feeling peculiarly nonspiritual in the morning.  By evening I would say, I probably felt the closest to Allah than I did the entire month.  That afternoon, my children and I were swimming in the community pool where 3 lifeguards watched over the large toddler pool that fed into a larger, deeper pool.   My children and I were together the entire time, except for a few minutes when my older children were playing in the deeper pool while I was playing with my younger children.  After a short time, I noticed my youngest son, who was not wearing a flotation device, was not around.  I scanned the rest of the toddler pool searching for my son.   Not finding him, my eyes turned to where my older two were playing; I did not see him.  In a calm, yet surreal manner, I began wading through the toddler pool to my older kids and when I turned the corner, I saw my older daughter struggling to lift my son above the surface of the water.   As my daughter passed his water laden body to me I was thankful to see that he was conscious and breathing.  I yelled for help as I put my son over the side of the pool.  After vomiting a lot of water several times, everyone was thrilled to hear him say that he wanted to go home.  He looked good, we went home.

Within an hour, my youngest son, who usually never sleeps in the afternoon, became very subdued and began to cough.  I was concerned, but not wanting to overreact, I just continued to monitor him.   I wasn’t sure how to read his behavior.   Shortly after, my son began to breathe with difficulty making a low gasping sound with every breath.  I took my son to the hospital, forgetting that my nearest facility did not have emergency services.  AlhamdulilLah, within minutes the nurse called 911 and via ambulance my son was taken to the nearest hospital with a pediatric intensive care unit.  From the firemen, to the paramedics, to the nurses in the emergency room, the message was the same.   For the benefit of our readers, I wanted to share this brief message as it can save lives.  Anytime a child falls in the pool, even if he did not become fully submerged, you should immediately go to the hospital for observation.  In short, if a little bit of fluid gets in the lungs, or even if not, within 24 hours the lungs can continue to absorb water from the body ultimately leading to death if gone untreated.  This is called “dry drowning.”

It turned out that my son did have fluid in the lungs.  AlhamdulilLah, after 24 hours of oxygen treatments, breathing medications, antibiotics and watching “The Lion King” 3 times (at my son’s request), he was released in good health.  Subhan’Allah, so many lessons (spiritual, practical, etc.) were learned that night in the ICU.  At the same time, my most humble iftar (meal to break fast) and suhoor (meal before fasting begins) were experienced in the ICU.  My best taraweeh and tahajjud prayers (extra nightly prayers) in the whole month of Ramadan, was performed in a cramped space between my son’s hospital bed and my visitor’s chair.  And that night was my most concentrated reading and reflection on Surat Ya-Seen (surah 36 in the Qu’ran).  I was grateful for the opportunity to get closer to Allah (swt) after feeling so “off” just earlier in the day.

To go back and reflect on “why so many difficult tests occur in Ramadan?” It is simple, Allah (swt) in his infinite Mercy, loves us so much, he gives us opportunities for increased dhikr (remembrance), prayer, dua (wishes), shukr (thankfulness), Qu’ran recitation and reflection, and contemplation through these trials.  And what a better time to perform all of these good deeds than in the blessed month of Ramadan, where the reward for good deeds are multiplied several fold?

Below are just a few of the benefits of being tested, especially in Ramadan, for the tested, for family and friends of the tested, and for the entire community.

The one who is directly tested has the potential for several rewards during his trial:

1. For being patient
2. For their increased tawakkul (reliance) in Allah (swt)
3. For turning to Allah (swt) in du`a’
4. For asking others to turn to Allah (swt) to make dua for them
5. For being humbled by the test and realizing that Allah (swt) is the Ultimate Planner
6. For reflecting on Allah’s (swt) qualities and His attributes
7. If there is a loss involved, for remembering how much Allah (swt) has blessed him with so many other things in this life
8. If there was imminent loss and health/wealth was saved, for thanking Allah (swt) for His mercy and blessing in being saved from that loss
9. For seeing others who have a tougher test, and praying for them and at the same time being thankful for not being tested as strongly
10. For doing extra good deeds in gratitude for Allah’s (swt) mercy during the test

For those who hear of their fellow brother’s/sister’s test they too, have potential for several rewards:

1. For making du`a’ for their fellow brother/sister
2. For asking others to make dua for the one who is being tested
3. For their increased tawakkul in Allah (swt)
4. For reflecting on the test and realizing/appreciating Allah’s (swt) attributes
5. As a result of the other person’s trial, for reflecting on Allah’s (swt) favor and blessings upon them
6. For their gratitude for not having suffered the same trial
7. For doing good deeds to help the one who is being tested (assisting with money, cooking for the tested person, helping with childcare, etc.)

And finally on a community level, people feel a stronger sense of connection amongst community members because:

1. People were open with each other in sharing their test and asking for du`a’
2. Community members united on something good, and contributed to the tested person’s general welfare through dua, donations, food, etc.
3. There was a greater level of interaction amongst community members due to the increased level of communication (i.e. regarding du`a’ requests, etc.)

As reflected in the following hadith (saying of the Prophet), May Allah (swt) bless us with patience and contentment during difficult times. Ameen.

“How wonderful is the affair of the believer, for his affairs are all good, and this applies to no one but the believer. If something good happens to him, he is thankful for it and that is good for him. If something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience and that is good for him.”

(Narrated by Muslim, 2999)

According to the American Psychological Association’s 2007 Report on the Taskforce on the Sexualization of Girls, females suffer greater challenges with self-esteem, are more susceptible to depression, and are held back in terms of learning math, sciences and athletic skills due to the sexualization (and objectification) of girls.  This phenomenon, caused by over exposure to images of females in sexual poses, clothing, and roles in the media including, movies, music, videos, magazines, advertisements, etc. is the basis for this study reported in 2007.  A very interesting and eye-opening conclusion was made in this report:

“Taken together, the work …suggests that sexualization practices may function to keep girls ‘in their place’ as objects of sexual attraction and beauty, significantly limiting their free thinking and movement in the world.”

Take the statement in for a moment.  Ponder.  Repeat.  This study was not conducted by a right-wing Christian group or by radical “Islamists.”  This research was conducted by a group of American Psychologists concerned with how the well-being of girls is affected by the process of making girls view their worth in terms of their looks.

Oftentimes Islam and Muslims are accused of suppressing women’s potential.  What’s refreshing about this report is that the reality behind these societal problems is spelled out in clear letters.  No more blaming foreign ideologies, religions, or followers of a particular faith.  “Keeping girls in their place” and “limiting their free thinking and movement in the world,” is a massive home-grown problem channeled through the media.

Sexualization in the Media

Toys marketed to girls such as “BRATZ” with puckered lips, miniskirts, and fishnet stockings during Saturday morning cartoons demonstrates the pervasiveness of sexy images in the media.  Images of women, or even just their body parts, are used to sell everything – from frozen vegetables, to air conditioning services and alcoholic beverages.  The exploitive use of women is not limited to commercials and advertisements, but also music lyrics, clothing, and video games.

The byline for an article in USA Today on January 24, 2013 speaks to this very phenomenon: “Super Bowl XLVII auto advertisers hope to drive up sales with humorous and sexy ads.”  This casual analysis of the use of women to sell cars points to the sexist and hedonic trends of the advertising industry.  Advertisers want one thing: to promote their product.  The result of how the promotion of their product affects their audience, unfortunately, is not a part of their concern.  The negative impact of the use of sexualized images of women is our concern as the public.

Girls, pre-teens, and young adults begin to internalize these images as something they should emulate.  Various studies show that the sexualization of girls leads to an increase in anorexia, low self-esteem, and sexual promiscuity, to name a few.  The ill effects of this trend not only affect girls and women, but also boys and men.  From a young age, boys also learn that girls and women are to be judged on their physical appearance.  These detrimental attitudes translate into problems in adulthood, when men fail to find the “perfect woman.”  The inundation of sexualized images creates an unrealistic mental image of what an ideal woman should look like and how she should behave.

What Parents Can Do

So what does this mean for parents, family members, and the community at large?

1. Limit children’s exposure to sexualized images.  Filter what movies, television shows, and other videos your children watch.  Have you ever heard yourself or your peers say, “But what else are we supposed to watch?!”  If we are to blindly watch entertainment without monitoring its value, then we would be like cattle, following the masses without using our intellect.
2. Talk to your children, especially your girls, about the importance of education, being a good friend, and keeping physically fit.  Having girls understand from a young age that their intrinsic worth comes from exhibiting positive values, not how well their looks emulate those on the screen, is vital to their healthy development.
3. Teach your family about media literacy. Pointing out these negative trends to our youth allows them to see the world with discerning eyes.  Just as we would teach our youth not to get suckered into fraudulent advertisements meant to scheme unsuspecting customers out of their money, we should educate them on the damaging effects of sexualization.  Visit informative websites such as www.medialiteracy.com and www.projectunmask.com, a youth-led initiative educating youth on the damaging effects media plays on teen self-perception.

By taking a proactive approach to combatting the negative portrayal of girls and women in the media, we can begin to change the way the world treats and views the female gender.

The concept of spreading good cheer in Islam is, at times, neglected and/or forgotten.  Abu Dhar, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated that Prophet Muhammad ﷺ  (peace be upon him) said, “Don’t underestimate any good deed, even meeting your brother with a cheerful face.” (Muslim).  Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also said, as narrated by Abu Dhar, may Allah be pleased with him, “Smiling in the face of your brother is charity.” (Tirmidhi).  So if smiling is charity, why are some of us so miserly?  Why don’t we see more people meeting others with a welcoming face?  This question has puzzled me for a long time.  I once asked a person who is “smile-challenged” about this phenomenon, and he simply shrugged.  After much contemplation and observation, I may have come to an understanding.

Once, a family member and I went to a restaurant.  After sitting at the table for some time, I was enjoying the simple experience and smiling while my dining partner was just straight-faced.  I asked what he was thinking, and he said he was analyzing how the waiter interacted differently with the people sitting at the next table than how he interacted with my dining partner.  I suggested that perhaps his own reserved facial expression prevented the waiter from engaging in a more amiable manner.  He couldn’t help but agree.  Two important points regarding smiling should be considered:

1. You reap what you sow.  The level of positive energy you exude through your facial expressions (not to mention your overall body language, tone of voice, etc.) often dictates the level of positive interaction you receive in return.  Anticipating positive interactions with others before they actually happen also helps to breed friendly experiences.
2. Your facial expressions reflect your inner feelings.  If you catch yourself spending your day with a frown, reflect on your thoughts.   What negative feelings are you harboring?  Consider reflecting on the positive side of each situation you encounter.  Once you modify your way of thinking, you will see a change in your facial expressions and may even find yourself smiling.

To put it quite simply, smiling creates a positive cycle of good feelings.  The act of exercising your facial muscles to smile helps to lighten your own mood, which reflects happiness on your face, which brings about a more positive response from others, which creates a deeper positive experience.  So, what if you are not inclined to smile?  Here are some tips:

1. Be conscious of the fact that you have a tendency to withhold your smiles and check yourself.
2. This may sound vain, but make a few mirror checks when you catch yourself frowning, or straight-faced.  Reflect upon the negative message you are sending.
3. Put on a smile, even if you are not in the greatest mood (especially when you are around your loved ones).
4. Make a conscious effort to watch others’ expressions and reactions when they see you with this lightened expression on your face.
5. Don’t think about the possibility of someone not returning a smile.  Someone else may be having a bad day, and may be completely oblivious to his surroundings.  The positive effect you have on one person can never be overestimated.
6. Reflect upon the fact that smiling is charity.  You are actually donating happiness to others when you flash your pearly whites.  And as is with all business in which we engage with Allah; when we give charity, we actually receive much more in return.  Aside from Allah’s reward, the reward of smiling is often returned with another smile, creating good cheer in a matter of seconds.

Making a conscious effort to smile at others is not only pleasing to Allah, but it helps to create a friendly atmosphere.  When you smile at your family and friends, you are letting them know you are happy with them and you love them.  And when you smile at someone you don’t know, you are offering a piece of happiness.  Spread good cheer, a little bit of effort goes a long way.

According to Merriam-Webster’s dictionary, to be humble is to not be proud, arrogant, or assertive.  In Arabic, tawaada (humility) literally means to lower one’s self or to submit.  Taking these definitions together and adding the characteristic of humility as relayed in Qur’anic verses and Prophetic examples, we begin to have a richer understanding of its importance and practical applications.

Three Degrees of Humility

Humility can be understood in relation to three important entities:

1) Humility before Allah – Exalted is He.

2) Humility in relation to the deen (religion).

3) Humility with Allah’s creation.

When analyzed in terms of these relations, we can begin to implement the characteristic of humility in all aspects of our lives: in our worship, in our understanding and attitude towards our deen, and in our interactions with Allah’s creation (such as people, animals and the earth).

Humility with Allah – Exalted is He

When we are humble in front of Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), we understand that He is our Creator, the One who supplies all of our sustenance with no might or effort from His creation.  It is only when we submit ourselves to the Might and Glory of Allah that we are able to understand how to be humble.  This cyclical process helps us to perpetuate the feeling of humility.

Ponder for a moment the blessings in your life: family, guidance from Allah, wealth, talents, health, etc.  If one is disillusioned by his own personal efforts made towards attaining any of his blessings, how can he attain humility before Allah? Take for example one who is wealthy.  He may attribute his hard work in school, his long hours at the start of his business, and his proficient networking skills to his success.  Yet, he forgot that Allah (swt) gave him the opportunity to attend a good school, facilitated for him the ability to study, gave his family patience while he was busy with his business, and finally bestowed him with the gift of persuasive communication.

And what if that same businessman refused to give zakat (alms tax) because he felt that others should work as hard as he did so that they wouldn’t need zakat? Regardless of our level of wealth, we must remember the saying of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ as narrated by Abu Hurairah: “Wealth does not decrease due to charity, and Allah increases His slave in honor when he forgives others.  And no one humbles himself before Allah but Allah will raise him in status.”

This act of humility in front of our Creator necessitates our complete submission to Him.  To follow His commandments and avoid His prohibitions requires us to understand our lower position of weakness and helplessness in relation to our Lord.

Humility in Relation to the Deen

Fully appreciating and understanding our deen (way of life), obliges us to be humble.  When we come across a commandment of Allah, Qur’anic verse, or valid saying of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ that we do not understand, we should be conscientious of our reactions.  Let us replace thoughts of, “Well, that doesn’t make sense,” with “I wonder what this means.”  We are encouraged  to question so as to understand our religion, not to negate every aspect of our deen that does not align with our whims.  We should also be wary of those who come up with their own interpretation of the Qur’an with no reference to its context or without any scholarly research to say, “This is what this ayah (verse) means to me.”  To do so would be to follow the zaygh (perversion in our heart), as mentioned in the following ayat:

He is the One Who has revealed to you the Book. Some of its verses are decisive – they are the foundation of the Book – while others are allegorical. Those whose hearts are infected with perversion follow the allegorical part to mislead others and to give it their own interpretation, seeking for its hidden meanings, but no one knows its hidden meanings except Allah. Those who are well grounded in knowledge say: “We believe in it; it is all from our Lord.” None will take heed except the people of understanding.(Qur’an 3:7)

Remember what Moses said to his people: “O my people! Why do you vex me while you know that I am the apostle of Allah sent to you?” Then when they adopted perverseness, Allah let their hearts be perverted. Allah does not guide those who are transgressors.” (Qur’an 61:5)

Humility in understanding the deen compels us to see a gap in our understanding when we approach a matter we are not “comfortable” with, as opposed to a fault in the way of life as Allah (swt) has prescribed for us.

Humility with Allah’s Creation

Applying the principle of humility with Allah’s creation would have profound effects on the way the world operated if we all adopted this characteristic.  Imagine if we did not judge others, we felt compassion towards humanity, and we helped all of those around us (our parents, spouses, children, community, etc).  We could achieve these admirable feats if we were to contemplate and exhibit humility.  Not only would we treat others with respect, but we would also treat animals kindly and give them their due rights whether they are a work animal, a stray, or a pet.  Furthermore, if we humbled ourself and understood that this world does not belong to us, then we would be more conscientious about water conservation, recycling, and pollution reduction efforts.

Unfortunately, the tendency to develop the very opposite characteristic, arrogance, occurs for many reasons.  Perhaps we are more beautiful, intelligent, or have some position of power or authority, for example.  If we were to reflect on the first type of humility with Allah (swt), we would remember that these gifts are only possible by the Mercy of The Creator.  Imagine one who has studied Islam and has received many certifications and degrees in the field.  When she sees others, does she look down on them since they do not possess the same level of knowledge in that area? Or does she instead, look to her own faults and sees others for the qualities they possess that are greater than hers?  Allah tells us to take the second course of action:

And do not turn your face away from men with pride, nor walk in insolence through the earth. Verily, Allah does not like any arrogant boaster. (Qur’an 31:18)

We are also reminded in the Qur’an that what Allah cares for most, above social status, power, beauty, or wealth, is taqwa (God-consciousness):

Verily the most honored of you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous of you. (Qur’an 49:13)

We should reflect on our inner thoughts and align them with teachings of humility in Islam so that we may be successful in the eyes of Allah (swt). May Allah make us humble and may He be pleased with us.  Ameen.

The Most Recognizable Identifier of a Muslim Woman

What is the first thing you think of when you see a woman wearing a headscarf?  Undoubtedly, the mental association between a woman wearing the headscarf and Islam is very strong.  More than any other article of clothing, hijab has become the most recognizable identifier of Muslim women.

This point hit home for a family member of mine when we sat together in a waiting room in one of Los Angeles’ largest hospitals. He witnessed several people pass by enthusiastically offering their salaam (greeting, literally peace) and asking how we were doing.  Afterwards, my family member turned to me and said, “Do you know these people?”  This was the first time he witnessed how powerful the hijab was as an identity marker in public.  How did they know I was Muslim? Undoubtedly, the headscarf was a clear giveaway.

With this strong association comes a myriad of pre-conceived notions, a sense of mystery (does she have hair?), stereotypes, and just plain fear. For many Non-Muslims, the headscarf represents a religion that is foreign and one they do not understand. The natural outcome, therefore, for those who fear the religion, is to fear its most apparent manifestation.

This intensified attention placed on the headscarf and on the women who wear it is much to the chagrin of some Muslim women. The emphasis placed on the head scarf leaves them feeling stuck in an un-engaging discourse at the expense of other pressing issues affecting the well-being of some Muslim women and girls around the world. This emphasis in and of itself tends to turn Muslim women away from wanting to learn about this practice, and as a result creates ill-feeling. Unfortunately, a vicious cycle is created where increased talk around the hijab is aroused (to defend its basis in Islam), and again some women feel repelled by the concept even further.

Associated with Oppression and Misogyny

There has been a surge of thought within the Muslim community that misogynistic views distort Islamic rulings. Granted that male chauvinism is a massive problem within the Muslim community that leads to such things as physical and mental abuse, double standards, and government-sanctioned transgression against women and girls, it is a worldwide issue affecting all cultures and religions.

Some say the disrespect of women has influenced the Qur’anic scholars of old to interpret ayat (verses of the Qur’an) to serve their own negative agendas: to oppress women. Those who feel that our fiqh (creed) is tainted with misogynistic opinions therefore argue that hijab is a result of such ill will towards women.

This type of reasoning has been viewed as liberating and refreshing. However, in reality, this is damaging and self-serving. Instead of searching for the wisdom behind some of Allah’s commandments concerning women, some use this argument as a license to refute basic Islamic principles relating to women’s dress and gender relations.

Out of Place in Western Society

Trying to adhere to an Islamic dress code in the West is challenging to say the least. Going against the modern current of wearing revealing clothing such as shorts that barely cover one’s underwear is like a fish swimming upstream. Amidst a sea of scantily clad bodies on the beach a Muslim woman feels totally out of place, yet proud.  She is proud that she is not self-conscious and superficial enough to be pressured into wearing a one or two piece bathing suit just to fit in. Instead, she values herself and her religion and does not feel the need to debase herself by submitting to a dress code founded on true oppression—the sexualization of women and girls.

Not surprisingly, the American Psychological Association couldn’t agree with this concept more. In 2007, the APA Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls reported several findings that point out the dangers of current fashion and media trends, and their effects on the healthy development of girls ((The Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls, www.apa.org/pi/women/programs/girls/report.aspx )) .  In the report, the APA defined sexualization as any one of the following phenomena:

• a person’s value comes only from his or her sexual appeal or behavior, to the exclusion of other characteristics;
• a person is held to a standard that equates physical attractiveness (narrowly defined) with being sexy;
• a person is sexually objectified — that is, made into a thing for others’ sexual use, rather than seen as a person with the capacity for independent action and decision making; and/or
• sexuality is inappropriately imposed upon a person.

These concepts are more easily understood in light of a study conducted by the APA. Two sets of girls were put into dressing rooms. One set was wearing bathing suits and the other was wearing sweaters.  Each set of girls then sat down in front of a mirror in the dressing room and was given a math test.  Results showed that girls wearing the sweaters achieved far higher scores than their counterparts.  Why? Girls with bathing suits were preoccupied with the way they looked, thereby affecting their ability to concentrate on the math test. Imagine then, how girls are affected on a daily basis amidst billboard ads, cartoons, movies, music videos, print ads, etc., that portray women and girls in a sexual manner.

Lack of Understanding of and Appreciation for the Scholarly Method

Lawyers and lawmakers alike would scoff at the idea that any layman can interpret U.S. law and understand its proper application. Yet, Muslims and non-Muslims share in the misguided idea that fiqh (jurisprudence) is a loose methodology of personal interpretations and whims. Just as a lawyer undergoes several years of education to reach his current professional status, so does the Muslim jurist who studies Shar’ia (Islamic law). How much alms tax should one pay? What are the conditions of a marriage contract?  These are not issues that one answer without proper education in Islamic Law.

One would ponder then, do we respect our U.S. legislation to the exclusion of our Islamic law, the very law of the Holy Qur’an upon which Thomas Jefferson based the writing of the Declaration of Independence and the United States Constitution? ((The Jefferson Qur’an, www.oxfordislamicstudies.com/Public/focus/essay0412_jefferson_quran.html ))

Visual Disparity Between Outer Appearance and Inner Character

Finally, a major cause of “hijabophobia” is the disparity between how some Muslims behave and their outer appearance. People associate wearing hijab with piety. Undoubtedly, to follow one of Allah’s commandments is a righteous deed in and of itself; and to wear the hijab in the West is a struggle.  Yet, we must remember, it is possible to follow one commandment and err in another, regardless of whether this error is apparent to others or not.  We are all human, susceptible to weakness of character and falling into sin. But, when women wearing the headscarf openly back-bite, are rude, or use foul language, a negative message is being sent. Some see this disparity and use this as an argument against wearing the hijab. Others who loosely associate themselves with Islam feel repelled from the religion even further. Unfortunately for women who wear hijab, their outwardly deeds become an instant invitation for judgment. No one knows if a Muslim really prays, fasts, or even pays zakat (charity). We shouldn’t muddle ourselves in the finger-pointing game, ready and waiting to throw blame on our fellow Muslims. Instead, we should all be engaged in a continual spiritual journey on the path to Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala—exalted is He.

To conclude, we shouldn’t fear one of the outer manifestations of our faith, the hijab.  What we should fear is pushing each other away from the deen (religion), thereby creating animosity amongst each other. Our Muslim circles should encourage what is right, discourage what is wrong, and provide an “open door” atmosphere, fostering love and respect amongst our fellow brothers and sisters. May Allah grant us open minds and open hearts. Ameen.

I am in a dilemma and need you to help me put things into perspective. It’s the age-old question of whether hijab is fard (mandatory) or not! I have been wearing hijab for many years now. I always believed that the ayah (verse) in Surat An-Nissa (Qur’an 4) is a personal choice that women make and can be interpreted in several ways but I was always afraid of dying without wearing hijab. Basically an old Egyptian shaykh (scholar) scared the heck out of me in my younger days, saying that women will hang in hell fire from their hair, and that’s how I decided to wear hijab. We have raised 3 boys in the process, ages 23, 21 and 14.

Within the last couple of years, my husband started commenting on why I am wearing hijab, if it’s attracting more attention through racism, etc. Why not just put my hair up in a bun so I’m not lavishly displaying my hair and Allah wants to make things easy for us not hard—especially in the society that we live in. He’s trying to convince me that if it was clear-cut like prayers and fasting, God wouldn’t have left it up to our interpretation. Lately, he has been increasing this rhetoric.

I am struggling with this! But on the other hand, I’ve been doing it for so long. I know many ladies that have taken off their hijab and the majority have no regrets and are okay with their decision. So a part of me is okay with taking it off and another part is not! Please help!

Indeed this is an increasingly common question for an age-old practice.  When I saw this question from one of our dear readers, it hit home.  Born to Egyptian parents who immigrated to the United States over 40 years ago in the midst of the Islamic Re-Awakening in Egypt, I too grew up with the notion that hijab was something commendable, yet optional.

I was content with my views regarding hijab until I was 20 years old.  I often looked at Muslim women observing the headscarf with a bit of confusion and pity combined. “Why would someone go through so much trouble? Why are they making it difficult for themselves?”

My belief was challenged, however, when unsuspectingly a relative of mine began wearing the hijab and gave a presentation about it at our masjid’s youth group.  Ironically, the masjid we attended was one of the rare few which did not propagate hijab, and depending upon the leader asked, the idea of its optionality was reinforced. I was shocked when I heard the clear evidence from Qur’an and Sunnah that hijab is fard.

I give some personal background to this question only to help readers who are struggling with this practice to understand that I am sensitive to misconceptions and public pressures surrounding the hijab. In this article, I wish to present clear evidence regarding the commandment of the headscarf and to provide rebuttals for the very common arguments Muslims raise concerning its status.

Evidence

In the Qur’an, the direct commandment for post-pubescent women to cover their hair and neck is in Surat An-Noor, ayah 31 (Chapter of the Light, verse 31).

“And tell the believing women to reduce [some] of their vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment except that which [necessarily] appears thereof and to wrap [a portion of] their khumur over their juyub and not expose their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, […]” (Qur’an 24:31)

After reading this ayah, one may notice that there is no mention of hair per se.  This is where many of those who question the obligation of hijab, stop and say, “But where does the Qur’an say to cover the hair?” This is an example of how understanding a verse based on the English translation alone and without historical context results in confusion.  Let’s back up and understand this ayah, phrase by phrase.

The Believing Women

The very first directive from Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) in this ayah is aimed at Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (peace be upon him) to “tell the believing women” to lower their gaze, etc.  There are those who claim that the commandments in this verse apply only to the Prophet’s ﷺ wives or only at the time of the Prophet ﷺ.  Yet the address is for the “believing women”—an all-encompassing phrase.  Remember the ayah:

“And We have not sent you [O Muhammad] except as a mercy to the worlds,” (Qur’an 21:107).

Prophet Muhammad ﷺ was sent as a mercy to all of humanity—not just to the people of Mecca and Medina.

Lowering One’s Gaze and Guarding One’s Private Parts

Note that the first injunction described here is for the believing women to “lower their gaze” which is to avoid looking at anything haram (unlawful). Secondly, they are commanded to “guard their private parts,” (which in the previous ayah, verse 30, Allah (swt) addresses the believing men and commands them first to do the exact same—who said protecting one’s body from haram is only for women?).

An important point to mention in this part of the ayah is the various English translations found to explain the phrase “yahfadthna furujahunna”. In Arabic, the literal meaning for this phrase is to guard their private parts. This is specific and strong language to forbid the believing women (and in verse 30, the believing men) from engaging in illegal intercourse. Interestingly enough, in Pickthall’s translation of the Holy Qur’an, “yahfadthna furujahunna” is translated as “to be modest” and in Yusuf Ali’s translation, we find “to guard their modesty.”

For years, I wondered why some Muslims have the notion that hijab is not fard, but that we are required, instead, to only “be modest.”  I believe I found the source in these English translations.   According to many ahadith (narrations of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ), we are required to be modest (which in Arabic, is “hayaa’”).  However, this verse, in particular, is not commanding the women to have “hayaa’” in the general sense.  Here they are commanded, specifically, to “guard their private parts.”

An explanation of how guarding one’s privates can be successfully accomplished begins with lowering the gaze and continues with the commandments outlined in the rest of the ayah as related to dress.

Women Are Not to Display Their Beauty

Next, the verse reads, “and not to display their beauty, except what ordinarily appears thereof.”  In Arabic, zeenatahunna refers to the women’s natural beauty or adornments (here, the scholars of Qur’an understood adornments to refer to the hidden places of the body where adornments are worn ((Ruh Al Ma’ani by Shihaab Adeen Abi Athanaa’, vol. 18, pp. 309, 313)) ) Therefore, the scholars of Qur’an agree by ijma’ (consensus) that “wa la yubdeena zeenatahunna” refers to covering everything, “illa ma dhahara minha”—except for what ordinarily must appear to carry out daily affairs in public, which is the face and the hands ((Al Mufassal fi Ahkam Al Mar’a wa Bayt Al Muslim by Abd Al Kareem Zaydaan, vol. 3, pp. 317-320)) .  Interestingly enough, the scholarly debate has always been between whether the face and hands are to be shown, or if they too, should be covered ((See Shuroot Al Hijab Al Islamiyya by Dr. Fouad Al Baraazi)) .  Until very recent times, this commandment from Allah (swt) to cover the hair was never debated by the common Muslim.  And this certainly was never up for debate amongst the scholars throughout history.

Sheikh Yusuf Al Qaradawi resonates with this very concept when he responds to the same question regarding the obligation of hijab in his book—Contemporary Fatwas ((Contemporary Fatwas by Sheik Yusuf Al Qaradawi, vol. 1, pp. 453-455)) . He states, “One of the great fitnas (trials) and intellectual conspiracies that has been introduced into the Muslim world is the alteration of matters of certainty to matters of doubt and debate.” He also states that all of the scholars throughout history from various groups such as the Sufis, the Dhahiris (the Literalists), the fuqahaa’ (jurists), and the scholars of hadith unanimously agree that it is fard for the believing woman to cover her hair.

Some discount the commandment of hijab altogether due to the weakness of a commonly cited hadith (narration) found in Sunan Abu Dawood where Aisha radi Allahu ‘anha (may Allah be pleased with her) relates that the Prophet ﷺ, who upon seeing Asma bint Abi Bakr wearing thin clothes said, “O Asma, when a women reaches the age of menstruation, nothing should appear from her except for this,” and the Prophet ﷺ pointed to his hands and face.  This reasoning is faulty because even if we were to entirely dismiss this hadith, the clarity of the various segments of the ayah are enough to prove the commandment of hijab by itself.  In addition, there are other authentic narrations from the Prophet ﷺ outlining how thick the woman’s outer garment should be, how loose, how long, etc. These descriptions of the woman’s dress, coupled with the injunction to cover the hair, and to not display their beauty, collectively emphasize the injunction to cover all but the face and hands.

Covering the Hair, Ears, Neck and Chest

The injunction for covering the hair is evidenced by “and to strike their khumur over their juyub.” In Arabic, the word khumur is the plural of khimar, which is a cloth that is draped over the top of the head and hangs downward.  This definition is unanimously agreed upon by all of the scholars ((Contemporary Fatwas by Sheik Yusuf Al Qaradawi, vol. 1, pp. 453-455)) . Juyub is the plural for jayb which is the opening in the front of the dress that allows the head to fit through.  The key is to note that the women at the time of jahiliya (pre-Islamic times) were already covering their hair, as was customary throughout history in various cultures ((See What People Wore When: A Complete Illustrated History of Costume, St. Martin’s Griffin, New York, 2008)) and religions ((See www.Catholicplanet.com/veil/index.htm)) .  However, by letting the ends of their khimar hang down behind their back; their ears, neck, and chest were exposed ((Ruh Al Ma’ani by Shihaab Adeen Abi Athanaa’, vol. 18, pp. 309, 313)) ((See “The Bible on Women and Their Hair” http://www.therefiner’sfire.org/women’s_hair.htm)) .  This style can be seen in the image below ((History of Costume, by Braun and Schneider)) .

Then came the commandment to take the khimar and “cover their juyub.” By doing so, the women would now be covering their previously exposed areas.

The photo above depicts again how the head cover was worn.  The next photo explains the action of “walyadribna” which literally means to strike, “bikhumurihinna” with their head covers, “ala juyubihinna” over the front openings in their garments.  Ar-Razi, explains that “walyadribna“—to strike—is used to emphasize the importance of covering this area ((Al Mufassal fi Ahkam Al Mar’a wa Bayt Al Muslim by Abd Al Kareem Zaydaan, vol. 3, pp. 317-320)) .

Finally, the last photo reflects how the khimar (head covering) is used to cover the previously exposed ears, neck, and chest.

Summary of Verse 31

Let’s take a moment to reflect upon what the believing women are commanded to do:

1. Lower their gaze
2. Guard their private parts
3. Not display their beauty and ornaments except what (ordinarily) appears thereof
4. Take their khimar (head cover) and cover their chest (and other previously exposed areas)
5. Not to display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers…etc.

It is very difficult to see how an ayah with so many specific, step-by-step commandments can be written off as someone’s “interpretation.”

Hijab, Khimar, Veil, Head Scarf…

Some say hijab is not fard based on the use of the word “hijab” itself.   Some argue that verses containing the word “hijab” in the Qur’an (which means to conceal, veil, screen, etc.) do not refer to covering the hair, so why do we use hijab to mean headscarf?  Let’s not get caught up in the semantics of the word hijab.  Suffice it to say that this word has become commonplace in the Muslim vocabulary to mean a head cover despite the fact that Allah (swt) uses the word khimar in the Qur’an. Yet the two terms are related in meaning. What matters is that we cover our hair, not the way in which we name the covering.

The Style of Qur’an

The Qur’anic style is not like our municipal codes of law that provide lists of rules and injunctions. Instead, the Holy Qur’an has a beautiful literary style in which Allah (swt) opens our hearts through stories, warnings, reflections, and direct commandments, all intertwined.

Imagine if instead of the ayah above regarding hijab, we were told to cover our hair, neck, shoulders, upper and lower arms, chest, abdomen and thighs, etc.?  How dry would that sound?  That is not the style of the Glorious Qur’an.

Take the obligation of prayer.  Can anyone deny the duty to pray Fajr, Dhuhr, Asr, Maghrib, and ‘Ishaa? The answer is no, yet nowhere in the Qur’an are these prayers listed together as part of the commandment to pray. Furthermore, a closer look will reveal that nowhere in the Qur’an are the number of raka’at (units) for each prayer described.  It is not necessary, since Allah (swt) sent His Messenger to teach us the specifics.

And although the issue of covering the woman’s hair has been submerged into a sea of heated debate, there is no hesitation to fully cover the hair and body for prayer. Again, the question is raised: where is this mentioned in the Qur’an? Why are we so resentful and phobic when we hear that women need to cover their beauty outside the home, yet we peacefully submit when it comes to matters of worship? Are we not trying to please the same Merciful Lord both in and outside of prayer?

Finally, some mistakenly look for exact words in the Qur’an to validate certain obligations such as hijab. “If there was an ayah in the Qur’an which read, ‘All women must cover their hair’,” I would have done so in a minute!” claim some who challenge the concept. Take a step back and remember that the command is to take the headscarf that covers the hair (khimar) and to modify how it was being worn. If there was a room full of women wearing head scarves, and you wanted them to cover their ears, neck and chest; how would you phrase the request? Would you ask them to put on a headscarf that they are already wearing, and then to cover the exposed areas or would you simply ask them to cover their exposed areas?

Conclusion

Referring back to our dear sister who submitted this question, the arguments you’ve heard to take off the hijab may seem convincing, however they are wholly unsound. To attract attention to yourself because you look different with the hijab is not the same as attracting sexual attention. And to refer to the verses and ahadith relating to hijab as interpretation is unfounded (there are many more ahadith not included in this article for the sake of brevity).  Finally, some use the ayah, “[…] Allah intends for you ease, and does not intend for you hardship […]” (2:185) to argue that hijab is not compulsory. If we had such license to rationalize away other injunctions when faced with any level of difficulty, what would happen to praying five times a day and to fasting?

While others around you were comfortable in taking off their hijab, I urge you not to do the same! From my experiences with sisters who have followed the same path, I have invariably seen unfortunate subsequent changes. Such changes include: tighter clothing, lower necklines, shorter hemlines, and more lavish hair-do’s, despite the intention not to. I know some sisters have had bad situations in which they were forcefully coerced into removing their hijab, may Allah make it easy for you. But for those sisters who contemplate this action by their own choice, I urge you and all of our readers to seek the pleasure of Allah and not the pleasure of His creation.