and sometimes this answer is immediate, which is even more intimidating and humbling and makes you feel rather guilty and more cognizant of your need for forgiveness, because even though that time you prayed you were completely humbled, human spirit is constantly changing, and you know you’re not *always* humble like that.

in today’s world, we are always so fixed on self-image, always wanting to appear dignified with people, even dying with dignity is so important to people. while dignity is a noble aspiration, excessive emphasis on it can make us forget that human beings are dependent and weak, and that yes, it may be in our old age or sickness we will lose that appearance of dignity we so cherish in our middle years. accepting it is better for the soul than trying everything, even suicide, just to preserve this mirage of dignity. accepting it instils the humility necessary to forge a connection of reliance to Allah, and recognition that what dignity we enjoy today is only by His permission which He may allow us to keep to the end or He may withdraw, to see if we rely on Him nonetheless.

Jazakallah khayr for posting the Arabic text for the dua!