As i was listening to the this GREAT lecture it emphasized how the first madrasa is the mothers lap and before even before that too. Alhamdulilah i look at this as a good thing, inshAllah since we seem to have A LOT of good, educated sisters this will mean A LOT MORE pious active leaders of our ummah brothers are going to come up!! That is one thing i will do inshAllah. I will have my own little Abu Bakr siddiq and Ibn Abass’s and of course Khadijas and Nusybahs (RA) INSHALLAH.
Their is not much we can do about todays world lets just make sure with Allah SWT guiding us we change the future of our Rasools SAW ummah!!

Great Article everything sounds familiar 😉

Siraaj

No argument there. I think you tied up all the loose ends with that last comment and alhamdulillah balanced out your article such that you leave us with no choice but to act on your advice and call to it, inshAllah.

jazak-illah khair

Jezakum Allahu khayrin for your responses, they were of great benefit for me alHamdullilah.

Just a note: I think a lot of us missed the point of this article, and it’s probably my fault in not making it clear. My plea was not for brothers to step up and become MSA presidents, it was to step and up and take serious responsibility for this ummah in all realms, not just leadership.

I began with my personal story as having to take on being MSA president two years in a row, and having the brothers being intimidated by that (I still don’t understand this- how you gonna be intimidated by someone who took up what you refused to take on?) to highlight the desperate need for brothers to just STEP UP in general- in the social realm, emotional and psychological realm, family realm [why do we have domestic abuse in our communities?! Is that manly? auothobillah!], etc. And that’s great that brothers don’t want to seek leadership positions, alHamdullilah! But there is a big difference between actively seeking a position, and taking one when you are needed.

I ended mentioning our MSA president being a brother this upcoming year, inshaAllah, in order to show that Alhamdullilah, men are there, and I personally can think of a number of brothers who have really shown amazing deen and character in the way they conduct themselves and the way they step up and take on responsibility, alHamdullilah. but we need a lot more of them. those brothers, in my personal experience, just like such sisters, are scarce. and that’s scary, because we need them enormously.

Of course I agree that we need followers of Khadija radi Allahu anha- may Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala make our sisters like her! ameen! and I specifically mentioned that the discussion of women is another topic because I know it is a needed one.

But here is my concern, and this is what I heard Imam Suhaib say once in a talk [not exactly like this]: Brothers say, “I want an Aisha [radiAllahu anha], I want a Khadija [radiAllahu anha]”, but they do not realize who the HUSBAND of these amazing women were, sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallama.

So brothers, yes, sisters do need to step up as well. It would be great if someone could write an article on how we can do that inshaAllah. But that does not make the reality of our lack of brothers who are willing to take it on- in all aspects where they are needed to be serious and step it up- any less. It’s not fair to fling the responsibility of the lack of men onto the lack of women, as if the problem will just go away or equal out. I know women, amazing sisters with all 4 of the qualities, who are in their late twenties and still can’t find a brother to marry. And they aren’t looking for Super Muslim. They just want a brother who will lead them and be serious about having strong character and deen. This post was not supposed to revolve around marriage, but I’m just mentioning it to point out the reality we face in our communities- sisters who are taking it on and brothers who are chillin, sisters who are trying to move forward, and finding too many brothers who are melting from chillin for so long.

Again, the reminder: If you’re looking for our ummah to be filled with women like Khadija radi Allahu anha, then brothers, you’ve got to start trying to be like the teacher of Khadija radi Allahu anha, the best man, sal Allahu ‘alayhi wa sallama.

Please forgive me, as my intention was not to offend anyone. I was just hoping to highlight a serious problem, and trying to suggest a few small ways which we can work to try and fix these problems through our revamping our connection with Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala through individual efforts.

Please keep me and my family in your dua’, wa Allahu ‘alam

ps- True Virtues, to link this to your blog, just copy and paste the entire thing, including the title, and insha’Allah it should link.

The lack of Muslim men stepping up the plate in leadership positions is foreign to me as our MSA has a good number of both males and females involved almost equally (alhamdulillah).

However, I definitely agree with some of the comments of how it takes great women to build great men, and how this is a cycle which is multi-facted and all it’s aspects need to be targeted before the issue in this article will begin to cease.

The cycle needs to be broken somewhere, and I believe it can start with educating our mothers and fathers first so that they can lay the foundation for Muslim children EARLY ON. I’m a firm believer in getting our children to develop an internalized Muslim identity from a very young age, because this will shape who they will become when they grow older. It is much easier to prevent things from happening than trying to fix them later, so this is something I think we all should be striving for within our communities, through the use of knowledge dissemination, halaqas, parent workshops etc.

I’m preparing for exams and was just able to read this today. Really great reminder.

Br. Man this is what I have to say:

The Best Hood Is Parenthood.

SDW

I was hoping that you talked more about being a man in social aspects as well.

Of course being president is very important, but it seems that socially myself and other brothers depict the role of “boys” instead of “men” in our society. It seems that in our community brothers are not men until we are married and having children.

I’m saying this because we insult one another and don’t take our religion seriously. We feel that, and this goes for myself first and foremost, we are fine the way we are and without changing ourselves we are on the path to paradise.

If you could address this topic that would be very beneficial.

Jazak Allahu Khayr