It is not easy to change the mind set and view of society
but your article gives a good idea about that.

I still hope that one day Allah will choose for me a spouse, and I will be honoured as a mother. Maybe it just goes the other way around for me in terms of life order. My point is, similarly maybe for those of you who chose to suspend public contribution to devote time to motherhood, it does not mean forever after that is all that defines you. There is a long road ahead, insya-Allah. When the children grow up you may want to re-enter active public participation. In fact, it probably makes you a better mother to do so (after the children are out of the most dependent infancy stage). A parent must raise children for the world *they* have to cope with, and to do so she must be aware of what that is, herself.

So I think the mindset change is not that one choice should actually be better than the other. But that there should be such a choice at all. All through human history, yes women have been primarily mothers, but invariably motherhood (and fatherhood) inseparably included inducting the children into the wider world that the adults live in. It’s just that in today’s complex world, that induction now requires a lot more keeping up with world developments than was ever necessary for previous generations.

salam yes umm Sarah, this is so hard, I had to go back to work after one year too and give Rayhan to daycare and some days he is being looked after by Abu Rayhan. But although I have a good job and well paid, my heart breaks every morning I have to leave him. It’s just something that Allah swt has ordained for me, if I feel grudge that my husband hasn’t got a good job etc then the situation just feels worse. What are we compared to Umm Musa who had to leave her son with FIRAWN, subhanallah…

As-salaamu ‘alaykum

Changing the societal view on a major issue like this is not something which can easily be done.

However, I think the fact that such articles are still being written expressing these views, and also that the comments indicate that this view is not (yet) completely alien, is a good thing.

I think it bodes well as it indicates that at least a sample of the current ‘online Muslim generation’ has a positive view towards this. Unless the naysayers are staying silent (which would be strange as this is usually not the case).

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu,

This is a partial transcript of a Productive Muslim interview with Imam Zaid Shakir. Edited for readability.

What beautiful advice Ma sha Allah! May Allah ta’ala bless Imam Zaid, sister Aminah who asked the question, the PM team and us, ameen.

Q. Do you have any tips or advice for sisters and/or housewives on how to balance between their kids, housework and pursuing activities for dawah?

A. First of all by understanding that a sister who has decided to stay at home with her children is doing the best thing she can possibly do by sacrificing time to ensure that the coming generation is nurtured. And nurturing is more important than education: that they’re safe, that their health, that they’re hugged, that they’re fed with love, doing that is critically important so understand that what you’re doing has great ajr (reward).

So yours is not a situation where your life is worthless where you think you could be getting so much more ajr if you were studying or doing something outside of the home.

So realize the importance of what you’re doing and then THANK Allah ta’ala for that opportunity, which is tasleem, i.e. to submit to Allah: “You’ve blessed me with children and I’m going to take care of them in the best ways [possible]”

And then, when one devotes himself to study when the children are napping or at the end of the day, when the children are in bed, then one devotes an hour or two, reads Qur’an, reads Seerah of the Prophet, then that time will be blessed, it will have barakah in it and that person will get more out of that time than if they had spent their whole day studying.

The time that was spent away from studying is appreciated also as it is a manifestation of what Allah ta’ala has decreed to happen during that time that you’re busy with the home or that you’re busy with the children. It’s this tasleem that opens up the door for Allah ta’ala to put barakah in the remaining time. So when a sister turns to her books or her mushaf, then she’ll get more out of it than she would have got out of it if she had studied all day because it is accompanied with pleasure with Allah’s decree, “Allah you’ve decreed that I have a family, you’ve blessed me with beautiful children, you’ve blessed me with the inclination to serve them”

Because of this pleasure with Allah ta’ala, Allah ta’ala blesses that person and He gives them far more benefit in the time that remains to be devoted to things such as studying, or reading, or reciting or memorizing something.

/end transcript

And when your Lord proclaimed: “If you give thanks , I will give you more, but if you are thankless, verily! My Punishment is indeed severe.” [Surah Ibrahim 14:7]

May Allah reward you abundantly and help you grow as a person to best serve His cause, and make your children leaders of the righious.

Your brother in Islam,

Haq

PS: Jzk for the bibliography