“Well at least you don’t have children.” You don’t know whether the divorce is actually in fact related to this issue, or complete inability to have children, which causes the parties a lot of pain. Or the grief of one of the spouses – usually the female, the one with the biological clock – that the dreams she had harboured of a family life by now, is lost and perhaps be too late to try again.

“But he/she was such a sincere revert!” this is similar to variations of #5. This is one of those instances where the divorce is probably NOT a light choice, or a choice at all, and is an emotionally extremely difficult test. divorce is hard enough between two people who already hate each other. it is beyond words to explain how hard it is for two people who still love each other.

I think the people tht talk about muslims divorcing left and right are completely ignorant and insensitive. Nobody, whether Muslim or not, WANTS to get divorced—it is a very traumatic experience, and even if the spouse whom you are divorcing was abusive and you know its the best to leave him, the divorce is still extremely painful. i think it speaks volumes to your arrogance that you actually believe ppl get divorced easily. when i was going through my divorce, I had one “friend” repeatedly ask me if im “sure” as the article said. it made me SO ANGRY…the fact that she thought she somehow was more concerned or put more thought into MY marriage than I did–the fact that she actually asked me “did you really think about it??” I felt like saying “No, I didnt…I didnt think about how this would affect MY life…I didnt think about it at all…thank you for pointing out that its an important decision that needs to be carefully deliberated over.”

I am shocked by the arrogance of the Muslim community sometimes.

Iam Witness of this whole scenario. Since i married a Relative who lives in USA becomes divorced. Iam so much relax on my decision and this articles helps me alot. please put these type of articles more on your website.. Cheers Jazakallah

the two muslim groups most harassed are the divorced and single/never married sisters…sigh.

may allah (swt) make it easy for the divorced muslims to find peace during their difficulties, and make it easy for the single muslims to complete half their deen, insha allah.

shukran + wasalam.

Well said sister! And to add to that, for those who say ‘stick it out for the kids’, have they ever considered how difficult it is for children to grow up seeing a parent in a miserable relationship, watching their parents fight all the time, or witnessing emotional or physical abuse? That, to me, is a lot harder to have to go through then seeing the parents separate and lead (inshaa Allah) happier lives.

This is not to say people shouldn’t be patient. But it’s not for anyone to judge whether or not the divorcee was ‘patient enough’ or tried hard enough. You weren’t part of the relationship, so you aren’t in position to pass judgment on people.

Don’t get me wrong- this is a very insightful article MashAllah =) As a yet-to-marry sister, I can’t help feeling more fear and intimidation than excitement for my future marriage. Nevertheless, I think it’s beneficial that our Muslim community is proactive in discussing the failures of marriage, and how to prevent or approach them. Keep up the good work!

May all our fellow Muslim sisters and brothers be granted harmonious and blessed marriages, Ameen!