So a woman can’t ask her husband to live alone and leave his mom but it is okay for him to ask her? You do realize she has to leave her parents too. How would it be if she brings her parents to live with her too? Would the husband be happy? Why is it it only to keep husbands mom happy? The wife has a mom too.

Assalamualaykum,

I really need help who can i speak to. I am unable to go to a local Imam for some sound advice.

I just desperately need to speak to someone who has Islam knowledge. Please.

Z

It’s not selfish at all sister. If we wish for our own space then it’s a right of ours that husbands must fulfil.
May Allah grant you sabr and your husband guidance to see that you are not in the wrong here.

That is a form of abuse. From his mother and from him.
Try talking to someone he will listen to?
May Allah grant you a happy and peaceful marriage.

Should one turn down a marriage proposal if you know the in laws (in particular the mother in law) are not very religious people? As much as one can judge from meetings and conversations, if they do not display good character but the potential spouse does, is it worth it?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated, Jazakallah.

Walaikum as Salaam wa Rahmatullah sister:

1. Don’t back down
2. Have him read this article if he already hasn’t
3. Find an Imam who shares your point of view and who he respects, and either have him meet with him or watch his video on YouTube.
4. Ask him how he would feel if your parents moved in. He would not appreciate the violation of his privacy.
5. Make lots and lots of Dua.
6. Emphasize that you want a good relationship and to stay close but that can be accomplished without being in each other’s face.
7. It is your Islamic right to have separate accommodation.
http://www.hibamagazine.com/joint-family-in-islam-challenges-and-solutions/

Jazak Allahu khayran Imam! Please give Khutbas and write articles on this topic. You will save countless Muslim marriages and families. If marriage is supposed to be about “love and mercy” as outlined in the Quran (30:21), then what does that make in-laws who seek to destroy that relationship Allah has made sacred through their abuse?

and moving out doesn’t mean moving thousands of miles away. You should live close by but in your own space. That will lead to far fewer problems between the usually controlling mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law.

Also, if your mother is blatantly lying about your wife or something she did or said, you do not have the right to falsely accuse your wife or abuse her. Taking your mother’s side when she is unjust will not lead you to Paradise.