On one Friday, he was suddenly hit by a novel idea. “Why don’t I just try Friday prayer today? Just to see what it’s like? I’ll just try it,” the man thought. He came in late to the masjid; The Khatib (speaker) was already speaking. As the man was looking for a place to sit, he heard the words of the Khatib, “The Prophet ﷺ (peace be upon him) has told us:

كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’” (Bukhari)

The man, preoccupied with having just entered and finding a place to sit, only heard a few of the Khatib’s words. He sat, perplexed, turning the fragmented words over and over in his mind, “Kalimatan (two words)… habibatan (both beloved)… ila-Rahman (to The Merciful)… Subhan Allahi wa bihamdi (Glory be to Allah and by His praise)… Subhan Allah il-`atheem (Glory be to Allah, the Immense).” He had lost complete focus on the rest of the khutbah (sermon), overtaken by these words he had heard in passing, working hard to make sense of what the words could possibly mean.

After the prayer, he approached the Khatib directly. “Is all what you’ve said in the khutbah today true?” he questioned. Surprised, the Khatib responded, “I’ve said quite a bit in the khutbah today. To what specifically are you referring?” The man replied, “You said some words… Kalimatan… habibatan… ila–Rahman… Subhan Allahi wa bi hamdih, subhan Allah il-`atheem.”

The Khatib smiled in recognition. “Yes, those are in fact from a blessed hadith (narration) from The Truthful himself ﷺ. He told us:

 كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’” (Bukhari)

The man stood, overwhelmed, awestruck, in a daze. The words had penetrated through his heart and embraced his soul. Captivated, he continued to repeat the hadith of the Prophet ﷺ over and over to himself:

كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’”

He walked out of the masjid in a trance and left for his home. Upon entering, he gathered his wife and children. “Have you heard,” he began to tell them, “the words of the Prophet ﷺ? He has told us:

كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’”

From that moment, the man transformed. From his home, he would leave to work, from his work, he would go straight to the Masjid, and from the Masjid, he would immediately go back home to his wife and children. All the while, two words kept his lips moving and his tongue wet with remembrance, “Subhan Allahi wa bihamdi, Subhan Allah il-`atheem.”

Soon, his friends from the Hookah Café noticed his continued absence. They came to his apartment one day. “Where have you been?” they asked. “We haven’t seen you smokin’ hookah with us for a while.”

A beautiful, wistful look came over the man’s face. “Haven’t you heard?” He replied to his old crew from the café, “The Prophet ﷺ has told us:

كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’”

And this is how he spent his days; reminding his family, his friends, those in the masjid and those who passed by in the streets, about the beloved words to Allah, those heavy words on the scale, those words light on the tongue, “Subhan Allahi wa bihamdi, subhan Allah il-`atheem.” The man had gone from a person who never prayed, spent little time with family and frequented the house of hookah instead of the House of Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), to a person who longed for Allah (swt), whose eyes were filled with tears, whose tongue, heart, and soul burned with the inscription:

كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’”

Soon, he fell ill. It had only been a few months since he had gone to the masjid, since he had first heard the beloved words of the Prophet ﷺ by the Khatib in a Jumu`ah (Friday) khutbah. He told his son to go and to ask the Masjid administration to call upon that very Khatib to come visit him in his illness.

When he was informed, the Khatib remembered the man immediately and rushed to his apartment. Upon being let in, he saw the man, sleeping in his bed, the doctor sitting at his side. The Khatib sat at the foot of the bed and waited for the man to awaken. Finally, the man stirred and he noticed, at the foot of his bed, the very Khatib who had related the beloved, noble words of the Prophet ﷺ.

The man looked at the Khatib. He then asked him, “Have you heard? The Prophet ﷺ has told us:

كلمتان خفيفتان على اللسان ، ثقيلتان في الميزان، حبيبتان إلى الرحمن: سبحان الله وبحمده، سبحان الله العظيم

“Two words are light on the tongue, heavy in the balance, beloved to the Merciful: ‘Glory be to Allah and by His praise. Glory be to Allah, the Immense.’”

With that, the man passed away.

The Khatib in this story is the teacher of my Arabic teacher. My Arabic teacher related this incident to me and continued to stress that it wasn’t a story from books of the past, it wasn’t a story coined to tug hearts, it was the true story of a man who was completely disconnected from Allah (swt), but to whom Allah (swt) gave a passing thought to enter the masjid, and who Allah (swt) blessed with hearing the words of the Prophet ﷺ at a time and in a way which truly impacted his soul and final actions in life.

My teacher then told me, “The Prophet ﷺ has said: ‘Convey from me, even if it’s just one ayah [verse]…’” (Bukhari).

We never know what word or action, done with a sincere intention, will truly be a means of impacting another person’s life to come back to Allah (swt).

Let’s stop judging people; let’s stop driving people out of mosques because “we” deem their dress, their swagger, their accessories, or language as something “unsuitable” to the House of God. Let’s stop assuming they’ll never be guided to “our righteous path” (since we’re so righteous, we guided our own selves, right?) and thus resolve to harsh words or disapproving stares. Perhaps those who “we” think are far from Allah (swt) will pass in a more honorable, beloved state to the One Who guides.

Let us be the first to cling to the beloved words to Allah (swt), “Subhan Allahi wa bihamdih, subhan Allah il-`atheem,” and let us warmly, sincerely and smile-fully be a means of helping ourselves and others come back to Allah (swt)—with His Power and Mercy—through relating the beautiful words of Allah (swt) and His Prophet ﷺ, through action and speech. We never know what small, miniscule act, may be a means of guidance for ourselves and another, and a means of possibly entering jannatul firdose al `alaa bi ghayri hisaab—The Highest Paradise, without any reckoning.

May Allah (swt) bless this man’s soul. Subhan Allah—if he had died like any other person who knows about the obligation of prayer and lazily defies praying, we would never know his story—he’d just be another person who passed away in another country, a person we may have never even known existed..

But perhaps because of his repentance and his sincere coming back to Allah (swt), Allah has blessed us with coming to know of him—so that his actions will continue to be rewarded even while he’s in his grave, every single time any one of us, because of his story, even across the world, remember to say, “Subhan Allahi wa bihamdi, subhan Allah il-`atheem.”

What will you do—so sincerely—that Allah (swt) will bless people with being transformed because of you, even after you’ve passed on?

By Fatoma Rad

Ramadan Healing

Another Ramadan has come and gone. I have always tried to make each Ramadan better than the one before, but this is the year that Ramadan came and made a lasting impression on me. You see, these two years have been filled with some trying times for me. Before this year, I could not recall the last time I looked forward to a Ramadan, or the last time I felt a change during a Ramadan. This year, I started to prepare myself before the month even started, I started being brutally honest with myself and sought help from all those around me.

As weird as it may sound, asking for help of any sort from someone is something really hard and new to me. It was around the second week of Ramadan I noticed the change in myself. I have been raised to put others before myself, and this a quality I am glad that I have and something that I hope to continue to have. It is easy to put a smile on my face and tell everyone I am okay no matter what I am going through. But the problem came when I did not know how to properly help myself. I noticed that my own soul was malnourished.

When I Felt That Allah No Longer Cared About Me

From the way people treated me, from the way people spoke down to me, and the way I let people make me feel, and most importantly, the way I spoke to myself, I felt completely empty inside. I was at a new level of low where I not only felt alone, but the hardest part was that I felt that Allah, subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), had left me and that Allah no longer cared about me. This is a feeling I pray that no one ever experiences. I spent so many nights and mornings in a daze trying to figure out how this happened to me. But one thing that I forgot is that this did not simply happen overnight.

Something that I wish was encouraged more while growing up is that Islam is a social religion. Humans are not supposed to be left by themselves, or to have to deal with everything on their own. This is something that took me a long time to learn and to accept—how to accept help, and let others in. I still have not fully come to terms with this, I am almost always on guard, and it takes a lot for me to let someone in. I will go out of my way to help others, let others know that I love and care for them, but letting others help me, take care of me —these are feelings that are still new to me. And it was when I finally took the steps to start asking for help, reaching out and opening up to those closest to me that I finally started to realize that I am actually not hopeless.

My Road to Healing

Before Ramadan began, I started opening up a lot to one of my closest friends—may Allah (swt) preserve our friendship and preserve the other in our lives to always help each other out, and may He grant her the best in this world and in the next, ameen (amen). We were talking about Ramadan approaching, and I was telling her how I really want this Ramadan to be different. It took a lot to have those conversations, and in a way, we were both hurting and helping each other by talking about our feelings. This allowed me to confront other people and open up and seek help through others as well.

I have been hurt by many people in this world, whether it was verbally, emotionally or even physically; but none of it measured up to the pain I felt when I thought Allah (swt) was no longer with me. This caused an actual physical pain in my heart that cannot be described. The pain was sharp, constant, and draining, and in the months before Ramadan, those closest to me noticed it and expressed their concerns. I began praying for this pain to go away, and somehow in the second week of Ramadan, for the first time in a long time, my heart was at peace. I was telling my friend how for the first time in a long time, I felt happy, and it was not a temporary happy feeling, it was a feeling of contentment. I felt content with everything and felt a sense of optimism that everything will be okay. All of the problems and fears that I had, and still have, somehow do not feel as scary. It was at this moment that I felt healed, as if the month of Ramadan healed all the heartache, took away all my worries, and put my anxiety to rest. But it was the words of my friend that brought tears to my eyes when she said:

“It makes you realize that all of our du`a’ (supplications) are actually answered.”

Subhan’Allah (Glory to God). I stopped and just sat at my desk at work and let it sink in. I wrote it on a post-it note and stuck it on my wall by my desk. Prophet Muhammad ﷺ (peace be unto him) said:

“‘Any Muslim who supplicates to Allah in a du`a’ which contains no sin breaking of kinship, Allah will give him one of three things: either his du`a’ will be immediately answered, or it will be saved for him in the hereafter, or it will turn away an equivalent amount of evil (from him)’ The Companions said, ‘So we will ask for more.’ He replied, ‘Allah is more [generous].’” (at-Tirmidhi, Ahmad)

I have known of this hadith (narration of the Prophet) my whole life. I have told this hadith to others. But it was at this moment that my friend pointed out to me how my du`a’ came true that this realization came at me full force, making me realize how I was so blinded by all the wrong in my life, that I failed to realize that Allah (swt) was surrounding me with blessings at all times.

Taking a Step Back and Understanding

My favorite ayah (verse) is:

“Verily with hardship comes ease.” (Qur’an, 94:5)

Sometimes we have to take a step back to realize, that the tough moments in our lives, the bad moments in our lives, also have some good in them. Throughout these years, I noticed that when I felt alone, there would be strangers talking to me; randomly giving me words of encouragement, making me feel loved and sometimes these strangers would even hug me or give me a pat on the back. These tough moments, forced me to learn more about myself, to face the things that I have been running away from.

But it was something else that I learned from Ramadan, something that I should have tried harder to remember: The importance of community. Imam Khalid Latif once said, “The Companions were strong not because they were perfect but because when they fell they knew how to lift each other up.”

Who do you turn to when you can’t get up? Who are the people that help you up when you feel like you can no longer move? What do you do when you see someone hurting? Not physically hurt, but I mean when you see that pain and sorrow in their eyes, what do you do? Subhan’Allah, I have been blessed with strangers who have helped me up, sometimes physically helped me up, and it is their faces that have helped me through my darkest times. It is the individuals throughout that month who offered a hand, who sat next to me and made du`a’ with me, who patted me on the back and put an arm around me when they saw I needed to be physically held. This is the beauty of the deen (religion) that we need to see more of. This is the companionship and mercy that we need to keep with us not just in Ramadan, but throughout the year.

Final Thoughts

Ramadan this year healed me, from the moments I was able to talk and reflect with friends, community members and strangers, to the nights I felt my heart at ease and was able to talk to Allah (swt) as if He was right there in front of me. But I would like to ask you all, to keep the mercy, the love, the healing power of being a fellow brother/sister all year long. As someone who has benefitted so much from others, I would like to ask you all to please always be there for one another, and if you see someone who needs help, or just a smile, be there for them. Ibn Al-Qayyim radi Allahu `anhu (may God be pleased with him) said:

“Perhaps you might be asleep while the doors of Heaven are knocking with tens of supplications for you, by a poor person you aided or a sad person you cheered up or a distressed person you brought relief to. Therefore, do not underestimate doing good at all.”

Let us all try to be the one who is the reason that someone else is smiling, the reason someone else has hope, the reason someone feels loved. I want to let you know that your kindness can make a difference in someone’s life. It is that kindness that has made a difference in my life and I pray I can learn to pass that hope, love and compassion on to someone else.

“O Allah, I seek refuge with You from anxiety and sorrow, and weakness and laziness, and miserliness and cowardice, and the burden of debts and the oppression by men.” (Bukhari)

Names of Allah Series:

All of us become ill. We may be inflicted yearly with the flu, get a fever or infection from time to time, or suffer from something more serious and/or more frequently, may Allah, subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), protect us all and ease the suffering of those who are ill. We are suddenly confronted with how weak we can be, and, sometimes without being conscious of it, plead with Allah (swt) to heal us. Indeed, as the Prophet Abraham, `alayhi as-salaam (peace be upon him), said:

“And when I am ill, it is He who cures me (yashfeen).” (Qur’an, 26:80)

Aisha, radi Allahu `anha (may God be pleased with her), narrated that when she or any of the Prophet’s ﷺ (peace be unto him) wives would become ill, he would put his right hand over the place of ailment and say:

“O Allah, the Lord of the people! Remove the trouble, for You are the Healer (al-Shāfī). No healing is of any avail but Yours; healing that will leave behind no ailment.” (Bukhari)

This du`a’ (supplication) teaches that it is Allah (swt) who is the Healer: He is al-Shāfī.

Sheikh Abdulrazzaq al-Bader said that the meaning of Allah al-Shāfī is that He is the healer of the diseases of the body and He is the healer of the diseases of the heart—such as rancor, envy, and hatred. Allah says in the Qur’an:

“… and [Allah will] heal the hearts of a believing people.” (Qur’an, 9:14)

The Healing of the Body

When we become ill, there are some of us who will grab a pill or visit the doctor. Others of us may try to figure out what the du`a’s of the Prophet ﷺ were in a similar situation.

Which one of the two groups believes with certainty that Allah is al-Shāfī?

The answer is: both, depending on the state of their heart. The Prophet ﷺ taught us that, “Every disease has a cure. So if the treatment is applied to the disease, the disease is cured by the Will of Allah.” (Muslim) The Prophet ﷺ set up a make-shift hospital in the form of a tent in Madina and appointed a woman named Rufaydah al-Aslamiyah (ra) to run it. Aisha (ra) stated that the companion Sa’ad bin Mu’ath was injured during the Battle of the Trench, and it was Rufaydah who tended to him (Muslim). Moreover, Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani praised Rufaydah’s skill and wisdom, as she realized that the arrow that had hit Sa’ad (ra) was too deep to pull out, and so she worked on stopping the bleeding instead.

Al-Shāfī is the source of all cure and healing. Allah (swt) created this world and its laws. He decreed that when a chemical reaction at a certain temperature occurs between oxygen and a fuel, the result would be fire. He also decreed that water would put out (most) fire. Similarly, the laws dictate that when certain things happen—injury, infection, an unhealthy lifestyle or particular genes—we become ill. And those same laws provide for us a prevention from or cure for disease.

Seeking these cures (or making use of the prevention) and making du`a’ are complimentary when we understand that al-Shāfī is the source. He heals us through the laws that He created in the universe—which is why we are commanded to seek cures for our illnesses—and through our asking for His healing. Indeed, the Prophet Ayyoub (as) (Job) prayed to Allah (swt):

“Indeed, adversity has touched me, and you are the Most Merciful of the merciful.” (Qur’an, 21:83)

And Allah (swt) healed him.

We must remember though that we can cause our own illnesses. Think of a person who is a heavy smoker and is then afflicted with diseases in his lungs and throat. Indeed Allah is al-Shāfī, and He can cure whom He wills, but we must also take responsibility for our actions. We cannot be resigned and say, “Well, Allah willed it,” as an excuse to avoid accountability. Allah (swt) says in the Qur’an:

“…do not throw [yourselves] with your [own] hands into destruction.” (Qur’an, 2:195)

This verse is in specific reference to withholding charity, but mufasiroon (commentators on the Qur’an) such as Tabari stated that the general meaning is also applicable to doing the things that may bring about your own destruction.

Illnesses, whether self-inflicted or not, also provide us with opportunities:

1. Realizing our need for Allah

There is nothing like illness that reminds us of our weakness and how much we need Allah (swt). It is important to be a worshipper of Allah (swt) in all circumstances, whether things are good or bad.

2. Purifying us

The Prophet ﷺ told us that, “No fatigue, nor disease, nor sorrow, nor sadness, nor hurt, nor distress befalls a Muslim, even if it were the prick he receives from a thorn, but that Allah expiates some of his sins for that,” (Bukhari). In another narration, a companion visited the Prophet ﷺ when he was ill. The Prophet ﷺ told him: “No Muslim is afflicted with any harm but that Allah will remove his sins as the leaves of a tree fall down,”  (Bukhari).

3. Raising our station

Allah says in the Qur’an: “Indeed, the patient will be given their reward without account.” (Qur’an, 39:10)

When we strive to be patient and steadfast through our illness—meaning here we continue in our trust in Him, pray to Allah (swt) and persevere with treatment if we have it—we have to understand that Allah (swt) gets it. He knows what we are going through. And nothing that you go through is wasted. The verse cited tells us that those who are patient will be given their reward without having to go through the meezan (scale) on the Day of Judgment (Tabari). So rest assured that your patience and perseverance has not gone unnoticed.

The Healing of the Hearts

Allah says in the Qur’an:

“The Day when there will not benefit [anyone] wealth or children, But only one who comes to Allah with a sound heart.” (Qur’an, 26:88-89)

While a person may be rewarded during their physical illness and forgiven for sins, there is no such reward for the diseases of the heart. The reward for the disease of the heart is in the effort put into its removal.

Allah (swt) tells us about a beautiful du`a’ in the Qur’an:

“And [there is a share for] those who came after them, saying, ‘Our Lord, forgive us and our brothers who preceded us in faith and put not in our hearts [any] resentment toward those who have believed. Our Lord, indeed You are Kind and Merciful.’” (Qur’an, 59:10)

Allah (swt) talks to us about those who come after the muhajiroon (people who emigrated from Mecca) and the ansar (the helpers), and the beautiful du`a’ that they make. They ask Allah (swt) to not allow any resentment in their hearts towards others. Knowing that Allah (swt) is al-Shāfī is turning to Him first in our quest to purify our hearts.

Many scholars have enumerated the diseases of the heart, and to go through that would entail a whole separate series. ((Sheikh Hamza Yusuf’s The Purification of the Heart is a must-read for the diseases of the heart and their cures.)) The diseases of the heart can manifest themselves in many ways, such as arrogance, envy, following base desires, miserliness, ostentation, heedlessness and others. The cure is in seeking knowledge – because knowledge empowers us to identify these diseases; remembering and returning to Allah (swt) frequently – as that connects us to Him, reminding us of our love for and fear of Him; and finally obeying Allah (swt) and good deeds – as they give us a spiritual light and teach us discipline.

What is beautiful is that there is a relationship between the healing of the hearts and the healing of the body. Related to following desires and discipline, for example, an article in the Journal of Personality found that exerting self-control can make you happier both in the long-term and in the moment, because disciplined people are able to avoid situations of temptation. Indeed, the Prophet ﷺ taught us:

“There lies within the body a piece of flesh. If it is sound, the whole body is sound; and if it is corrupted, the whole body is corrupted. Verily this piece is the heart.” (Bukhari)

Healing Body and Soul

1. Seek cures for your illnesses.

Pay attention to both the diseases of the heart and the body, and seek the appropriate cure.

2. Pray to Allah for healing.

Remember that He is the al-Shāfī and that healing starts with Him.

3. Remember the du`a’s of the Prophet ﷺ.

In addition to what was mentioned above:

i) When visiting a sick person:

أَسْأَلُ اللَّهَ الْعَظِيمَ رَبَّ الْعَرْشِ الْعَظِيمِ أَنْ يَشْفِيَكَ

“I ask Allah the Mighty, Lord of the Mighty Throne that He cures you.” (Ahmad, Tirmidhi)

ii) Reciting Surat al-Fatiha seven times. (Tirmidhi)

iii) Aishah (ra) said, “When a member of the Prophet’s family got ill, the Prophet would blow over his body by reciting the two protective surahs (Al-Falaq [113] and An-Nas [114]) and would rub him with his hand.” (Muslim)

iv) A`udhu bi `izzati Allahi wa qudratihi mimma ajidu wa uhadhir.

“I seek refuge and protection in the august might and power of Allah from the pain and illness I am suffering from and I am afraid of.” (Ibn Majah)

4. The Qur’an is a healing.

Allah (swt) says about the Qur’an:

“And We send down of the Qur’an that which is healing and mercy for the believers…” (Qur’an, 17:82)

The Qur’an is a physical healing and is an ultimate spiritual healing for our hearts.

May Allah al-Shāfī heal our hearts and bodies. Ameen (Amen).

By Umm Ameen

Alhamdulillah (praise be to God) my husband and I were blessed with the opportunity to perform Hajj in 2014.  Deciding to go to Hajj was one of the most difficult decisions I ever had to make since becoming a mother. As a homeschooler and protective mother who is a firm believer in attachment parenting, family and friends were shocked when I shared our Hajj plans. A dear, genuinely concerned friend asked, “How do you expect to leave your baby for so long during Hajj when you couldn’t even leave her with me for three minutes without worrying so much?” My response: “When I left her with you to quickly run to my car, I wasn’t leaving her for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He).” As I uttered these words, I shook inside with gratitude toward Allah for guiding me to that realization at that specific moment. Another friend encouragingly reminded me that I am going for my children and was not depriving them in any way. Now that I’ve returned from the amazing journey, I realize that performing Hajj while leaving my little children at home was the best thing I’ve ever done for them. Please pray that Allah (swt) accepts my Hajj and invites me again and again.

I’d like to share some ideas that helped my children before and during my journey. I pray that these ideas will inspire, encourage, and give hope to other mothers contemplating Hajj insha’Allah (God willing).

1. Make du`a’, du`a’, and more du`a’ (supplication) for your children and for Allah to make the separation easy on them and you. Since the inception of our Hajj plans (at least 8 months before Hajj 2014), I started asking Allah (swt) to guide me towards making a decision that was the most pleasing to Him and the best for my deen (religion), dunya (worldly life), and akhirah (hereafter). I performed istikharah (a specific prayer and supplication asking God for guidance) and immediately saw events unfolding in favor of me going for Hajj. I continued to make du`a’ (supplication) imploring Allah to take care of my children in my absence and admitted that it was He, not me, who has been the one taking care of them even in my presence since before their conception! During Hajj, I undoubtedly missed my children tremendously. I made it a point to make du`a’ for them every single time I thought of them. Alhamdulillah, I have no regrets there. May Allah accept all those prayers!

2. Break the news to your children gently in an easy way for them to understand. I decided to hold off on any Hajj related discussions with the children until after Ramadan 2014. One night, as I was tucking them into bed, it just felt like an appropriate time to break the news. The words naturally rolled off my tongue, and alhamdulillah Allah made it easy for me wherein I didn’t cry or express any hesitation whilst talking to my older two. I remember sharing something like, “You know that no matter how much I love reading to you and playing with you, when it’s time for salah (prayer) I drop everything and pray, right? Allah is above everything, and our duty towards Him comes first. Just like salah is a pillar of Islam, so is Hajj. Did you know that this year Allah has invited Mamma and Baba to perform Hajj? Do you know what that means? It means that insha’Allah Baba and I will be going to Makkah for a few days. Hajj is too difficult for children and it’s not safe for me to take the baby so alhamdulillah we’re so lucky that Nanna and Abba will be staying here with you. Isn’t that exciting? It’s going to be so much fun for you! Baba and I are going to make lots and lots of du`a’ for you while we’re there insha’Allah. Do you have any special du`a’ that you want me to make on your behalf?” The children took the news very well alhamdulillah; coincidentally, they even attended a children’s Hajj Simulation at a local mosque the day we departed on our journey.

3. Plan countdown surprises and notes to keep them feeling loved, reassured, and entertained. Our trip was a total of seventeen days. For each day, I had a little gift bag for my children to open. I numbered each gift bag and hung them high on a wall from 17 to 1. This line of gift bags served as a countdown for Mamma and Baba to return. The gift bags contained little items that I carefully chose knowing that they would make the children happy: yo-yos, fancy pencils, whistles, magnifying glasses, bouncing balls, etc. My husband and I also wrote little notes in each bag addressing our children. One note read: “Dear Bhaijaan and Didi, We are so lucky to have you in our lives. Please give your baby sister a hug and kiss from us and play ‘catch, catch, catch’ with her today.” I was told that the children enthusiastically awoke every morning begging an adult to bring down their gift bag. Alhamdulillah.

4. Record videos of yourself for your kids. My husband and I recorded ourselves reading aloud our children’s favorite books. We must have had a total of four to five hours of reading their all-time favorite picture and chapter books. We recorded these videos using our webcams and spent about thirty minutes each night after the children went to bed. During our read aloud sessions, we would pause and “talk” directly to our children commenting, questioning, or reflecting upon the happenings in the book. For example, when a character screamed, “I am all alone!”, I paused and told my children to remember that no matter what, they will never be all alone because Allah (swt) is always with them. Recording these books was a very powerful experience for me and sometimes brought tears to my eyes. I had to re-do my one year old’s favorite book three times since I cried every time I tried to record myself reading to her. Alhamdulillah my children absolutely loved watching the videos, and it was great “baby sitting” for the grandparents when they needed a break. My children still view the videos and thoroughly enjoy them when I’m out running errands, busy with the baby, or performing other household chores. I recently played a recorded book while I busily worked around the house. I grinned from ear to ear upon hearing my daughter responding out loud to the questions that I had posed while my son gently reminded her that “Mamma can’t hear you when she’s in that video.” These videos were a lifetime investment, alhamdulillah, and I totally recommend them to everyone.

5. Buy and wrap `Eid gifts to make their `Eid fun and joyful. I couldn’t imagine my children spending `Eid without their parents, but of course they had a blast with their grandparents and their favorite uncle. Prior to leaving, I bought them special `Eid gifts and wrapped them. My mom surprised them with the gifts on `Eid day and sent me pictures. My family and friends also generously showered the children with gifts.

6. Organize play dates with friends in advance. Alhamdulillah I’m blessed with a beautiful community filled with friends who are eager to please Allah (swt). I requested my trusted friends to take my older two for a few hours every day. The children went on field trips, carnivals, Qur’an class, friends’ homes, etc. They had so much fun every day masha’Allah to the point where I was convinced that I surely missed them way more than they missed me. Alhamdulillah this also gave my parents more time to focus on the toddler who stayed in their warm and loving care 24/7.

7. Have extra toys in case all else fails. I ordered some educational toys and hid them in the garage. My mom knew where they were and would use them as needed. I think she introduced a new toy/activity every four or five days.

8. Make a calendar for the kids to keep them excited and informed. I replicated a calendar on a poster and listed all the dates and days of the week that we’d be gone for. Under each day, I wrote the special activity that the children would be involved in on that day. Entries such as Sky Zone with Mamu, Zoo Day, Play date with Abdur Rahman, Sports Class, Mamma and Baba Return, etc. kept the children excited and informed.

Alhamdulillah I am so grateful to Allah (swt) for inviting me to Hajj and making it so easy. Reflecting back, I was definitely more nervous and anxious than needed. My children were not affected negatively in any way at all and our relationship only grew stronger. The du`a’ that I made for them during Hajj are priceless and made it totally worth leaving them. I had initially contemplated going when the children were much older and independent. However, I now honestly and confidently recommend going as early as possible during your youth so that you can make du`a’ for your children now, and they can start reaping the benefits of the special heartfelt prayers that YOU, their loving mother, made for them when you first saw the Ka`bah, or when you were standing on Arafat, or while gazing at the stars in Muzdalifah. Imagine the power of those du`a’! The du`a’ of a mother who sacrificed so much, put her Lord before her children, and chose to accept His invitation to perform Hajj. I also constantly reminded myself that I may not live another year for another chance. Hajj is something I had to do, not just for my children, but for myself. May Allah accept and invite me again and again.

If you have any additional ideas, please share!

Many of us have experienced, are experiencing or will experience difficult moments that make us wonder whether there is any hope for our future. These moments rock the foundations of our inner selves. They can throw us into abysses of doubt and devastate our self-esteem, nearly obliterating our sense of hope for a life that we dreamed of.

These moments are often full of anger, sadness, regret, or a combination of all. They show up in our lives as the death of our child, emotionally painful marital strife or divorce, through difficult living situations, or health problems that wage war upon our physical bodies which leave us in constant pain. They can materialize through financial losses, physical assault, or sexual abuse and victimization.

How does one recover from these traumatic times? How does one trudge through them and come out of the other side still capable of functioning and finding some semblance of joy in life? And how does one deal with the realities of these problems, and find the strength to develop optimism and happiness again?

If you are being victimized or have thought about hurting yourself – seek help from professionals immediately.

Before we discuss how to turn towards God to withstand tribulations and heal the rifts in our hearts, I want to mention that if you are being hurt physically in any way, you should not hesitate for a single moment in seeking help from the authorities. Contact a friend, a school counselor, a teacher, or the police. Many people hold off on doing so, thinking that their situation will get better or that reporting their victimization will somehow bring dishonor on their family; they think their abuser will one day stop. This  only makes bringing an end to the abuse more difficult. You need empowering to end the situation immediately, and then we can begin to discuss your healing process. The same goes for anyone thinking about hurting themselves or have already self-harmed. Before any progress can begin spiritually, this physical complication needs to end.

Islam values the roles of expertise and professionalism, as the Prophet ﷺ (peace be upon him) said: “Verily Allah has prescribed proficiency (إحسان) in all things” (Muslim). We should remember that religion alone is not a ‘cure all’ – but that each subject field has its own set of professionals and licensed workers who can help us through various issues. Thus, if victimized, we should always seek to protect ourselves through the professionals in law enforcement, and sound medical advice – in addition to prayer and faith.

The Trap We Fall Into: “When my situation is better, I will be able turn to God and practice my religion better.”

One of the reasons for Islam’s revelation, along with improving the human condition and pointing the way towards Allah’s worship and love, is to give us the spiritual sustenance we need to navigate through life’s tribulations.

As Muslims we can make the mistake of idealizing Islam as being some kind of perfect lifestyle that if implemented ‘we will have the perfect life, without the trials and difficulties we face today’. We may think that Islam is a set of teachings, rules, and acts that we can only incorporate fully when our lives aren’t so messed up. What happens when we think this?

Firslty, we may suffer withdrawal symptoms of finding sweetness in our prayers and pray just to get salat out of the way, if we pray at all. We break our relationship with the Qur’an. We might start to withdraw emotionally and spiritually from engaging with Islam as an active path to allow God’s Light to burn away the impurities, the anger, the sadness, the depression, and the burden in our hearts. Finally we may completely stop thinking about Islam altogether, learning about it, and conversing with it. We instead believe that before we can engage with Islam and partake in strengthening an ongoing relationship with God – we need to lick our wounds and heal from the calamity that has befallen us.

This thinking is a fatal mistake that first and foremost is one of Shaitan’s (Satan) best tricks: to push us away from engaging Islam and pursuing a relationship with God, precisely when our hearts are bursting with negative emotions and sadness. Shaitan dupes us precisely when we NEED GOD THE MOST. This in turn misplaces the reason why Islam came with a form of worship to God and functional way of life. Islam came to strengthen us, heal us, and ultimately guide us to salvation from these trials of life. Whether those trials are spiritual, material, emotional, or all of the above, we must maintain that Allah (swt) is our Friend. The One Who will never leave His worshipper alone. The One God Who will never forsake His slave. He is Allah. And His names tell us about His true attributes:

As-Salam – The Source of Peace
Al-Muhaymin – The Guardian
Al-Qahhaar – The One Who Subdues with Strength
Ar-Razzaaq – The Provider
Al-Fattah – The Giver of Victory
Al-Latif – The Gentle
Al-Nur – the Light
Al-Mu’eed – The Restorer

So, we come to the main question. If we are going through a tribulation and we are stressed with what no-one in the world understands, why would we not want the Source of Peace on our side? Why wouldn’t we want to engage with Ar-Razzaaq, The Provider to strengthen us? Why do we shy away from studying and delving into life’s trials that the Giver of Victory has sent down to us?

It is time to ask the only One Who Subdues with Strength to subdue our sorrow, and ask God to shine His light into our lives and Restore our joy. This is why Muslims use du`a’ (supplication) for anxiety as taught to us by the Prophet ﷺ:

“O Allah, I am Your servant, son/ daughter of Your servant, son/ daughter of Your maidservant, my forelock is in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just. I ask You by every name belonging to You, which You name Yourself with, or revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the unseen with You, that You make the Qur’an the life of my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety.”

Just look at this beautiful du`a’ taught to us by our Prophet ﷺ. Here, we are reminded of Allah’s (swt) Overwhelming Dominance over everything and over ourselves. We are also reminded of His Names, so that we can feel connected to His unlimited abilities that help us understand His roles in our lives. And finally, we are reminded of the Book – the Qur’an – that He sent, and through the Qur’an, the religion that is outlined for us.

But how can the Qur’an be our heart’s light and a release for our sorrows if we never read it? How, if we did not drown ourselves in it and in learning its secrets?

The Test is Not Whether We Bear Calamity, But Whether it Pushes Us Towards Allah

We know from Surat-al-Mulk that Allah (swt) has created life and death in order to try us and test us. We also know that Allah (swt) tries those whom He loves. However, there is more to life than simply passing a test of difficulty.

The test is not only whether or not we will bear the burden we are given, with patience. The test is also accepting that for our patience, at the end of the road is a guaranteed reward. It is accepting that a child we lost will insha`Allah (God willing) play with Prophet Ibrahim (as) in Paradise. That through patience a broken marriage devoid of love will be replaced by one that is better in this world or in the Hereafter. And that a painful sickness endured with remembrance of God, only results with each ounce of pain forgiving a sin clean.

The test is not simply to remember these things either, though they are the key to being patient. The ultimate test is whether the calamity pushes us towards Allah (swt). Whether we are able to take our difficult situation, and rather than relying on ourselves alone, recognize our dependency on and rely on God. From this we can then pursue a stronger relationship with God Who can bring peace to our hearts, and we can seek knowledge of how the deen (way of life) He revealed can in fact ease our pain.

It may be easy to worship Allah and engage with His deen when our lives are perfect. But that is exactly the wrong point. Our lives are not perfect, and will never be. So will we worship Him by participating fully in His Religion, even when things fall apart around us? Will we accept that the Sovereign King has the power and the mercy to bring us what we so desperately need? We must begin turning back to Allah, today, because He loves us unconditionally every day. And how does Allah love His servants? This story from the Prophet ﷺ should give us the answer:

“…Suddenly, a woman saw an infant in the midst of the captives. She took hold of it, brought it into her bosom, and started nursing it. The Prophet then told the Companions, “Do you think that this woman would throw her child in the fire?” We said, “No, By Allah she would not, if she is able not to.” He then said, “Allah the Exalted is more merciful with His slave than this woman with her child.” (Al-Bukhari)

They say that one of the signs of a good friend is the ability to listen to you. We all appreciate those amazing people in our lives who we can call up at almost any time and just talk to them. A close loved one who is there, does not interrupt and just hears what we need to say. And it is even better if that person has witnessed what we are experiencing, because we know that they understand.

Ever thought of Allah, subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), in that way?

To emphasize that He hears and sees everything, Allah (swt) reveals the following verse in an incident where a woman named Khawla bint Tha’laba, radi Allahu `anha (may God be pleased with her), went to the Prophet ﷺ (peace be unto him) to complain about her husband.

“Certainly has Allah heard the speech of the one who argues with you, [O Muhammad], concerning her husband and directs her complaint to Allah . And Allah hears your dialogue; indeed, Allah is Hearing and Seeing.” (Qur’an, 58:1)

When this verse was revealed, Aisha (ra) the wife of the Prophet ﷺ was shocked:

“Praise be to Allah Whose hearing encompasses all voices. Khawlah came to Allah’s Messenger ﷺ complaining about her husband, I was in the other room but I could not hear what she said. Then Allah (swt) revealed [these verses]!” (Bukhari)

What message is Allah (swt) sending to us? Allah is al-Samee` al-Basir—the All-Hearing and the All-Seeing. He is telling us that He hears us—and when Allah (swt) hears us, it is not a passive act. When we pray, we say, “Allah (swt) hears those who praise Him.” Now, it does not mean that Allah (swt) does not hear those who do not praise Him. But the type of hearing implies both awareness as well as action: it is listening. It means that because you have praised Allah (swt)—and that means you know you have a Lord that has all the attributes of praise—He is listening to you and will respond to you. And we are also told that He sees everything. He is not oblivious to anything that is happening to you.

Ibn al-Qayyim (ra) says that Allah (swt) is all-Hearing such that He hears all of the prayers to Him in all languages, and listening to one person does not distract Him from listening to another; and All-Seeing such that He sees the crawling black ant under a hard rock in the darkest of the night. When you talk to Allah (swt), it is a one-on-one even if you are in a crowded room full of people. You are the focus of His attention. Do not ever belittle yourself to think that Allah (swt) would not listen to you. Al-Ghazali (ra) also said beautifully that Allah (swt) “hears secrets as well as whispers, and even what is subtler and more concealed than these.” Allah (swt) even hears the thoughts that go through your mind that you have not even articulated. And Al-Basir—the All-Seeing—is the “one who witnesses in such a way that nothing is remote from Him, even what is under the earth.”

Allah (swt) has many, many attributes. Some are hidden and some are revealed. So why does Allah (swt) reveal to us that He is All-Hearing and All-Seeing?

The first is to let us know that He is aware and also to reassure us. When Musa, `alayhi as-salaam (peace be unto him), and Harun (as) were told to speak to Pharoah, they were understandably afraid. They said to Allah (swt):

“Our Lord, indeed we are afraid that he will hasten [punishment] against us or that he will transgress.”

And Allah (swt) responded to them to reassure them:

“Fear not. Indeed, I am with you both; I hear and I see,” (Qur’an, 20:45-46)

So when you are feeling lonely or in difficulty, call out to the One who hears everything and sees everything. Talk to the One who revealed this attribute to you so that you know that He is there for you. He is the close One that listens to your words when they are spoken and when they are trapped in your heart and you cannot express them. Rest assured that the difficulty that you are going through has not gone unnoticed.

You are never alone. He is with you – hearing and seeing.

And because He is al-Kareem (the Most Generous), when He hears those thoughts and hopes that remained trapped in your mind or in your heart, He still responds without you asking. How many of us have had unexpected gifts given to us—the exact thing we were hoping for without asking for it—knowing that no one heard these hopes except Allah?

Secondly, knowing that Allah (swt) is All-Hearing and All-Seeing should make us aware. There are certain things we would not say in front of someone we respect. Knowing that Allah (swt) hears and sees everything should make us vigilant over our speech and actions.

Finally, Sheikh Abulrazzaq al-Badr (ra) stated that the reason why as-Samee` comes before other attributes when they are paired is that, for us, Allah’s hearing of our calls and our du`a’ (supplications) is more important. It is reassuring to know that Allah (swt) hears us.

What does it mean for us?

1- Talk to Allah (swt)

You know that He can hear you, and that He understands your language. So speak to Him and tell Allah (swt) what is in your heart. It does not necessarily mean that you have to be asking for something. You could just be talking to Allah (swt).

2- Guard your speech and actions

Remember that Allah (swt) can see and hear and everything, so guard yourself against evil speech and evil actions.

3- Accustom yourself to hearing and seeing what is beneficial

Allah (swt) gave many of us the ability to hear and see, so we should be grateful for these gifts by using them in beneficial ways.

“O you who have believed, decreed upon you is fasting as it was decreed upon those before you that you may become righteous,” (Qur’an, 2:183).

Allah (swt) tells us about fasting and who is exempt, and right in the middle of these verses, He reminds us that He is near:

“And when My servants ask you, [O Muhammad], concerning Me – indeed I am near. I respond to the invocation of the supplicant when he calls upon Me,” (Qur’an, 2:186).

When we are fasting from food and drink, we are made to realize how in need we are of Him. We are distracted the entire year but Ramadan reminds us: Allah (swt) is near to us! Allah (swt) is near to YOU.

So ask Him.

In every sajda (prostration), just before you break your fast, and in the early hours. Ask Him in those moments when you feel your heart is broken, or when you have been let down or simply when you want someone to listen.

Be right there at Allah’s doors knocking every single day and night. If you were to stand at the door of a human being and knock multiple times a day every single day, they will open that door even if they do not like you.

Now imagine that you are at the door of al-Fattah (THE One who opens doors), al-Wadud (the Affectionate), ar-Rahman (the Most Merciful) and al-Mujeeb (the One who answers). You are at the door of the One who LOVES when you ask Him. You are at the door of the One who does not lose anything by giving to you. And you are at the door of the One who said, “Call upon Me; I will respond to you,” (Qur’an, 40:60).

We create mental blocks in our mind to prevent ourselves from asking because we are afraid of being rejected. We are afraid to lay bare our needs to our Creator because: what if He rejects us? Who else do we have?

But with Allah (swt), you can be vulnerable. Allah (swt) never, ever turns away those who seek Him. He knows everything you are going through without you saying a word.

In His wisdom, He teaches through the process of giving. Some things will come easy. Other things will take time. But remember that al-Mujeeb will respond with His mercy and wisdom. When you ask Allah (swt) knowing just these two attributes, your eyes and heart will always be open to the good, because you know what kind of Lord you have. You have everything to gain and absolutely nothing to lose, so pray with all your heart.

Make this a Ramadan of du`a’ (supplications). Think of the things that you truly want for both dunya (this world) and akhira (the Hereafter), or try to visualize where you want to be this time next year. And focus on those things, knowing that He is there and that He heard everything—that even when your tongue was tied but your eyes brimmed with tears, and you could not find the words: He heard your heart.

Ramadan task: One way to keep hope alive is by keeping a journal of “answered du`a’“. Write down the du`a’ that Allah (swt) has answered, both the big things and the small, and you will see all the times Allah has been there for you.

10 Steps to Ace Your Exams: Part I | Part II | Part III

This is the third in a series of articles entitled “10 steps to Ace your Exams”, in which I hope to extract gems from traditional Islamic sources which are of benefit to students struggling to revise for their exams.

4. First things first

Allah said in a hadith qudsi (divine narration through the Prophet ﷺ, peace be upon him): “…My servant does not draw near to Me with anything more beloved to Me than the religious duties that I have made obligatory upon him; and My servant continues to draw near to Me with supererogatory work such that I love him…” (Sahih Bukhari)

There is a difference between acing our exams and becoming an expert in the subjects that we will be tested on. The former can be achieved in a relatively short time period and involves identifying what topics we are expected to know for our exams, to what degree we need to know them and which questions have come up in previous exams. As for the latter, we can spend the rest of our lives trying to become “experts” in our respective fields. Unfortunately, many students, in their quest to “aim high”, fail to distinguish between the two. They try to understand absolutely everything about, for example, neurology, when they are not even going to be tested on much neurology in their exams.

Putting first things first is a law that Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala – exalted is He) has instituted for those wishing to draw near to Him, and just as it is applicable to praying your obligatory prayers before performing any supererogatory works, it also applies to our revision. Let us therefore strive to pinpoint exactly what we need to know for our exams and not expose ourselves to the inevitable onslaught of despair and procrastination that comes from shouldering information that we do not need to bear.

5. Keep it simple, silly

The Prophet ﷺ said, “Islam is based on five principles: to testify that none has the right to be worshipped but Allah and Muhammad is Allah’s Messenger, to offer the prayers dutifully and perfectly, to pay zakat (obligatory charity), to perform Hajj (pilgrimage) and to observe the fast during the month of Ramadan.” (Sahih Bukhari)

It’s difficult to remember a thousand different facts with no apparent relation to one another, so let’s try to make life simple for ourselves. Are there any core messages that we can identify in our revision? If there are – and I guarantee there are – then it makes things easier for us. These core messages provide the foundation for further details to be added, just as the five pillars provide the foundation upon which our faith can be established. For example, as medical students, we are taught to simply list all the possible diagnoses for a particular patient using the “surgical sieve”: the cause can either be congenital or acquired; if it is acquired, it can either be vascular, infective, autoimmune, metabolic, inflammatory, neurological, neoplastic or degenerative in nature. Once we’ve started considering the relevant causes, only then can we start to explore specific diseases and their subtypes, eventually reaching a diagnosis. Of course, we could just jump to a diagnosis straight away, but for beginners at least, this is very difficult to do and it could potentially result in overlooking other possible causes.

6. Story time

“There was certainly in their stories a lesson for those of understanding…” (Qur’an 12:111)

How do you ensure that you are internalising what you revise? How do you turn your revision from a passive colouring-in-a-book activity to an interactive experience? How do you prevent your mind from forgetting everything you have revised in the actual exam itself, let alone months or years afterwards? Turn your list of facts or theories to remember into stories.

Stories are one of the best ways for us to understand, remember and, as a result, convey a message – for life. In fact, they are also an incredibly effective way to act upon what we have learnt, as they serve as verbal simulators – translating what may be abstract concepts into practical examples to be followed. For this, and many other reasons, stories are one of the communication media of choice in the Qur’an. Therein, Allah (swt) has perfected the art of storytelling, thereby providing us all with the best example to follow when dealing with messages, in any shape or form.

It doesn’t matter what topic we are revising, from anatomy to economics – if we do steps 4 and 5 properly, we can easily turn our revision into a boredom-free, procrastination-free, interactive story telling process and pass our exams with flying colours, inshaAllah (God willing)!

7. Sharing is caring:

The Prophet ﷺ said: “Convey from me, even if one ayah (verse), for it may be that the one being informed will comprehend better than the one listening (at present).” (Sahih Bukhari)

If we did step 6, then 7 is the next natural step. If stories are an awesome way to convey a message, then it doesn’t make sense to create a story and not share it. By sharing our stories, and our knowledge in general, with others, we are not only following the Prophet’s ﷺ command, but we are following in the footsteps of Allah (swt). Out of His Mercy, He “shared” knowledge with us (though in reality, all knowledge belongs to Him) – the Qur’an being a perfect example of this. Again, we find that by heeding Allah’s (swt) instructions, He takes care of us by instilling in us habits which enhance our learning.

As the hadith (narration of the Prophet ﷺ) above alludes to, sharing knowledge is not only the best way to test whether we have truly understand what we have learnt, but it also encourages others to share information with us. Thus, we are able to learn and gain new insights from others, even if they are just asking us questions. Those of us who fear that our own grades will suffer even by spending the slightest amount of time helping others should renew our intentions, and remind ourselves that “to Allah will be the outcome of [all] matters” (Qur’an 31:22). Results only come from Allah (swt), not from our own efforts. Let us therefore direct ourselves towards Him and follow His commandments, and start sharing what we have learnt with others, even if it is just one fact.

By Marwa Abdalla

I was praying dhuhr (the noon prayer) not so long ago when my four-year old daughter came and stood by my side. Our usually noisy house was strangely quiet. Our oldest daughter was at school and our baby was napping. There we were, praying together, bowing to Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), standing again and then going into sujood (prostration). All was quiet, until, while in sujood, I heard a tiny voice whispering:

“Please Allah, give me a castle in jannah (paradise). Please Allah, give me a castle in jannah. Please Allah, give me a castle in jannah.”

My daughter kept repeating her request over and over, and upon hearing this, my eyes welled up with tears.

When we finished our prayer, I could not help but hug her. I sat, holding her, and thinking to myself, how did my habit of making du`a’ (supplication) to Allah (swt) compare to hers? Had I remembered, as she had, that the Prophet ﷺ (peace be upon him) had told us that we were closest to Allah (swt) when we were prostrating to Him and that we should use this opportunity to ask of Him? ((Abu Hurairah radi Allahu `anhu (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that Allah’s (swt) Messenger ﷺ , said: “The nearest a slave can be to his Lord is when he is prostrating, so invoke (supplicate) Allah (swt) much in it.” (Muslim))) Had I remembered to request from Allah (swt), the Provider and Sustainer of the universe, my castle in jannah?

Sadly, I realized that in my prayer, not only had I not asked Allah (swt) for my castle in jannah, I had actually failed to ask for anything. I had prayed perfunctorily, distracted from the reality of how close Allah (swt) was to me as I stood before Him.

The Prophet ﷺ tells us, “There is nothing dearer to Allah (swt) than a servant making du`a’ to Him,” (Tirmidhi). Nothing dearer! And yet how often had I neglected to do this?

The Prophet ﷺ also tells us that du`a’ is the worship. It encompasses so much of what the Islamic creed stands for: belief in the unique power of Allah (swt) as the Lord of everything; belief that only Allah (swt) can aide us when we are in need; reliance upon Him for all our affairs; hope in His mercy and forgiveness for our shortcomings; humility in knowing we are nothing without Him.

Allah (swt) is the All-Knowing, the All-Hearing and the All-Seeing. He already knows what we conceal in our chests:

“He causes the night to enter the day and causes the day to enter the night, and He is Knowing of that within the breasts.” (Qur’an, 57:6)

So whether we think of something at night or during the day, Allah (swt) already knows it. He already knows what we want or need. Nonetheless, He tells us we must do our part and ask of Him. So what prevents us from doing so?

It may be that, sadly, many of us fail to understand just how important du`a’ is. We think it is somehow secondary to other acts of worship, like praying and fasting, and that it is an optional act that we may or may not take part in. Furthermore, many Muslims actually worry that they are not capable of making du`a’—thinking that they have to have some sort of extensive knowledge of Islam or of the specific du`a’ made by the Prophet ﷺ in order to carry out this act of worship properly.

The truth is that du`a’ is simply a conversation we are having with our Lord (Rabb).

A very special kind of conversation.

Special not because of what we say, but because of why we say it. When we make du`a’ we are affirming Allah’s (swt) position in our lives and His control over everything: our successes, our failures, our inclinations, our emotions—indeed, even our ability to follow His guidance.

What makes this conversation even more special is that when we hand over this control to Allah (swt) and submit to His will admitting our utter need for Him, the result is not a feeling of helplessness or despair, rather it is a feeling of peace and serenity in our hearts that can only be experienced in order for it to be understood.

And we need not make du`a’ in Arabic or in any other specific language. We need not even memorize or recite the exact words used in the du`a’ of the Prophet ﷺ.

However, as in our daily conversations, we should realize that there are certain etiquettes that need to be observed when making du`a’. Although scholars may list numerous recommendations on how to best to make du`a’, I would like to highlight just three ((“When one of you prays, let him start with praise of Allah (swt), then let him send blessings upon the Prophetﷺ then let him ask whatever he likes after that.” (Tirmidhi, 2765, 2767).)) .

Firstly, the Prophet ﷺ instructed us to begin our du`a’ by praising Allah (swt), calling upon Him by His most beautiful names. Allah (swt) says in the Qur’an, “And to Allah belong the best names, so invoke Him by them,” (Qur’an, 7:180).

Secondly, he told us we should send peace and blessings upon the Prophet ﷺ.

After that, he says, we should ask of Allah (swt) whatever we need or desire.

. Once we have made du`a’, we should sincerely believe that it will be answered. We should remember that to Allah (swt) belongs all that is in the heavens and the earth and that He is fully capable of granting all of us everything we have ever wanted. Allah (swt) tells us in a hadith qudsi (sacred narration),

“…O My servants, were the first of you and the last of you, the human of you and the jinn of you to rise up in one place and make a request of Me, and were I to give everyone what he requested, that would not decrease what I have, any more that a needle decreases the sea if put into it…”(Muslim) ((Hadith 24 from An-Nawawi’s 40 Hadith))

We should also be consistent in making du`a’. The Prophet ﷺ cautioned us against being hasty and giving up on du`a’ when the response from Allah (swt) is not immediate ((The Prophet ﷺ said: “The slave will receive a response so long as his du`a’ does not involve sin or severing of family ties, and so long as he is not hasty.” It was said, “What does being hasty mean?” He said: “When he says, ‘I made du`a’ and I made du`a’ , and I have not seen any response,’ and he gets frustrated and stops making du`a’ .” (Bukahari, 6340; Muslim, 2735))) .

And if everything just mentioned above were not enough to remind us to not let our worldly affairs and obligations distract us from simply calling upon Allah (swt), and to be persistent when doing so, the Prophet ﷺ further reminds us that no du`a’ will be made in vain:

“Any Muslim who supplicates to Allah (swt) in a du`a’ which contains no sin or breaking of kinship, Allah (swt) will give him one of three things: either his du`a’ will be immediately answered or, it will be saved for him in the hereafter, or it will turn away an equivalent amount of evil (from him).” The companions said, “So we will ask for more.” He replied, “Allah (swt) is more [generous].” (at-Tirmidhi, Ahmad)

Life can be distracting, but we should not let those distractions prevent us from the great benefit and reward of making du`a’.

Our prayers provide us with the perfect opportunity to ask Allah (swt). To ask that He may facilitate for us our affairs in this life and guide us on the path that pleases Him, that He forgive us for our mistakes and shortcomings, and that He, out of His endless Mercy and Bounty, grant us all our castles in jannah.

That day, praying with my daughter, I realized I could not bring back the opportunities I had missed, but I could do my best not to miss any more.

Photo: Colleen P

My wife says that this could be her last Ramadan.  I protest saying it could be, but it could also be mine, and it could be anyone else’s, and that no one is guaranteed anything, anyway.   This is half-hearted and she knows it.  We do indeed all know that we are going to die but my wife—age 32, and a year into her diagnosis of stage 4 kidney cancer with metastasis to multiple organs and bone—is keenly aware of this.

Ramadan is a time to reflect on death and to turn platitudes like “remember death” into spiritual cures.  For many—and ourselves included prior to the cancer diagnosis —death was not routinely on our minds.  We may think about it during Ramadan, then we forget, settling back into our comfortable routine.

But cancer disrupts routine.  There are appointments and scans and side-effects and drugs.  There are waiting rooms filled with other patients, seeing their frail bodies and strong souls and then whispering, “May Allah save us.”  Your own body, weakening and shrinking, testifies to its eventual demise; the cancer is literally waging a mutinous war.  We shudder when reading articles that talk about survival in months, not years.  A quickly evaporating sense of time races perspective forward, and forces you to focus on the finite period of time you have left.  We have learned some lessons along the way, although we ourselves have by no means fully implemented all of them.  We still struggle every day. Nonetheless, we hope that sharing some of these realizations may help others benefit without the trial.

We have learned that effective use of time starts with paying real, active attention—to be firmly attuned to your state and the blessings surrounding you.  Whether that is pondering the richness of the Qur’an, the power of the ocean waves, the beauty of your spouse, the soft caress of a summer breeze, the miracle of your mental and physical faculties… Doing this consistently takes effort.  This diagnosis has given us an opportunity to deeply reflect on the bounty of our Rabb (Lord). What is important quickly separates, like cream rising from milk.  Frivolity becomes lame and spending moments with loved ones and God becomes paramount. And diagnoses like these shows that life is a collection of moments, and our goal should be to make each of those moments an act of ibadah (worship), because that moment is itself a mercy of our Creator.  Recognition and attentiveness to your blessings are keys to happiness.  Even in this difficult time we realize that we are still so very blessed. Remember the refrain:

“Then which of your Lord’s blessings would you deny?” (Surah Rahman)

Know that however bad you think you have it, there are better people who are in worse conditions.  Be grateful: “So remember Me; I will remember you. And be grateful to Me and do not deny Me.” (Qur’an, 2:152)

Going though this make it abundantly clear that control is only an illusion.  The veil is lifted and you are reminded over and over again that the only one in control is the One. “Allah [alone] is sufficient for us, and He is the best Disposer of affairs [for us]” (Qur’an, 3:173). In the end no one can help you, not your degrees, connections, doctors, friends, or family, unless God allows them to.

And the main means of accessing Him is through du`a’ (supplication), genuine, heartfelt—and in our case, desperate—du`a’.  Remember:  “And when My servants ask you concerning Me, then surely I am very near; I answer the prayer of the supplicant when he calls on Me, so they should answer My call and believe in Me that they may walk in the right way,” (Qur’an, 2:186).  We make du`a’ and beg everyone we meet to make du`a’ for us as well.

We are also reminded that the outcomes that we pray for may not be the outcomes that He has planned. Remember:  “It may be that you hate something when it is good for you and it may be that you love something when it is bad for you. Allah knows and you know not,” (Qur’an, 2:216).  It is a humbling reminder, but we still must maintain hope.  We continue to pray for what we think is best, but know that God may have something better in store for us.

In the end, we are all terminal—a mitotic misadventure away.  But do not wait for a calamity to bring you to your knees to remind you of this and make the most of the precious, limited, beautiful time you have now.

May we humbly request that you remember us in your du`a’.

The author wishes to remain anonymous.  You can contact him at: CancerIslam@outlook.com