Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) begins by telling us where Mary was, when the news of her coming test was revealed to her. He says:

“And mention, [O Muhammad], in the Book [the story of] Mary, when she withdrew from her family to a place toward the east. And she took seclusion from them. Then We sent to her Our Angel, and he represented himself to her as a well-proportioned man.” (Qur’an, 19:16-17)

Mary, at this time, was in a place where she was alone, far away from her people. If she reached out for help from anyone, she wouldn’t find them. It was at this time that an Angel was sent to her and in the form of a man. Imagine this: it was a man she didn’t know and she had never seen before. He could be evil for all she knew so she was frightened instantly:

“She said, “Indeed, I seek refuge in the Most Merciful from you, [so leave me], if you should be fearing of Allah.” (Qur’an, 19:18)

She was scared, so she called out to him with the one thing that she hoped would turn him away if he had any faith in him, the name of God. She told him to think about his God and that if he feared Him at all that he would leave her and not do her any harm. The Angel responded letting her know who he really was, which should have been comforting, except for the fact that he had some shocking news to go along with it:

“(The angel) said: “I am only a Messenger from your Lord, (to announce) to you the gift of a righteous son.” (Qur’an, 19:19)

A son? To the young, unmarried, God-fearing woman she was. One can only imagine the intense fear she had inside of her at this time. Not only for how her life would change, but how her family and community would act. There was no way that they would understand what was happening when she herself could hardly fathom it. So she then asked the question of this blessed angel:

“She said, “How can I have a boy while no man has touched me and I have not been unchaste?” (Qur’an, 19:20)

The angel responded:

“Even so; your Lord says: It is easy to Me: and that We may make him a sign to men and a mercy from Us, and it is a matter which has been decreed.” (Qur’an, 19:21)

At this point, Mary knew there was nothing she could do to change the decree. She knew that she was about to undergo one of the hardest times of her life, but God had told her why. He said that this son of hers would be a sign to men and a mercy to the people. How could such a hard situation be a mercy? Although it’s hard for us to comprehend, God knew exactly what He was doing. Mary then carried her son in her womb and then went away from the people at the time of his birth. She went away to be alone during one of the hardest times a woman faces, but as we know she wasn’t alone.

“And the pains of childbirth drove her to the trunk of a date-palm. She said: “I wish that I had died before this, and had been forgotten and out of sight!”” (Qur’an, 19:23)

She was in such pain and in such a hard position, knowing what might come, that she wished she had just died. Not just died but that she had been completely forgotten. How many of us can relate to that feeling? Feeling that whatever is happening to us, be it internally or at the hands of the others, is too hard—so hard that we wish we had just died before it ever happened. But now let’s take a look and see what happened to Mary:

“But he called her from below her, “Do not grieve; your Lord has provided beneath you a stream. And shake toward you the trunk of the palm tree; it will drop upon you ripe, fresh dates. So eat and drink and be contented. And if you see from among humanity anyone, say, ‘Indeed, I have vowed to the Most Merciful abstention, so I will not speak today to [any] man.’ “ (Qur’an, 19:24-26)

A voice (some say this was the baby Jesus’s voice and some say it was the angel) gave her news that she didn’t expect. He told her that beneath her God had created specifically for her a stream and that if she just shook the palm tree dates would fall for her to eat. God was sending her the message that even though she was in such hardship He hadn’t left her all alone—rather He had granted her exactly what she needed to get better and to make it through this trial. He then told her to not speak to anyone, because God was going to send a sign to make her innocence apparent, and we know that this sign was the speaking of Jesus himself even though he was only a child. And now, years and years after her difficult test in life, we know that her pains were a great benefit not only to herself but the world at large—a result that she could not have assumed while in the midst of her trial—in the midst of her tears and her pain.

So we too should take this lesson from our beloved Mary. Whenever we are in a test, we should know that God will never leave us alone. We should know that even when things look impossible, He can make a way out. We should know that even if the community or the ones we love turn against us in this trial, we still have God, who will never turn away from us as long as we cling to Him. Know that He will provide you your own stream—in the manner that you need, and know that He will provide for you your own palm tree with delicious dates—in the manner that you need. Just believe, and cling tight to Him, and He will pull you through.

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV

When we think about Mariam (alayha sallatu wa sallam – may Allah send His peace and blessings on her), how often do we associate her role with the da`wah of Islam? Do we realize how much she cared about her people being receptive to guidance, coming to the truth? Do we realize how much of herself she gave so that Islam would spread? Do we recognize that we can extract lessons from her as a Daiyah (Islamic worker/caller)? Would it surprise you to know that there has been a historical debate amongst the scholars on whether or not Mariam (as) was a nabiyah (female Prophet), as she was someone who received revelation directly through Jibreel? I actually tend to agree with the opinion that she was not a nabiyah, though she may share with the prophets a similar status in righteousness. Yet, I bring this question forth for a purpose: it’s easier to admit to ourselves, that we really do not know Mariam (as) and the role she played in the da`wah of Islam, as much as we’d like to think we do. As da`wah is something many of us may be involved in, her story and example, especially in the 21^st century, is one we cannot do without.  While this article will not do justice to the subject, we will focus on just a few significant lessons that Mariam (as) provides for the Islamic worker.

1. Da`wah’s first step: Developing the God-consciousness of the listener

When the Angel Jibreel first appears before her in the form of a man, while she is alone, she states:

“I seek refuge in the Most Merciful from you, [so leave me], if you should be fearing of Allah.” (Qur’an, 19:18)

Imam Az-Zamakhshari mentions that as she was turning to Allah, she was also hoping that her act would encourage this stranger to turn to Him too. At-Tantawi’s tafsir adds that the reason Mariam calls specifically on Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala – exhalted is He) as Ar-Rahman is to effect hope in this stranger, whom she believed to be  transgressing, such that they would go back and abstain from any evil they had initially set out to do. Let our community activists remember from Mariam (as), the importance and even precedence of giving those who seem intent on sinning hope in the Mercy of Allah (swt). It is interesting to note that in the story of Mariam and `Isa (as) in Surah Mariam, Allah (swt) is constantly being referred to by His blessed name, Ar-Rahman. Surah Mariam also tells of the plights of other prophets including Ibrahim, Musa, and Idrees (`alayhim as-salaam). A lesson in da`wah that we can take from this is while the path of teaching has struggle, we must also remember the Most Merciful is He who eases that path.

She tells Jibreel, “If you are God-fearing,” as only a God-fearing person would follow orders and prohibitions. This is expressed in a seemingly incomplete conditional sentence. While the condition of being God-fearing is mentioned, the response to the condition (known as ‘jawab ash-shart’) is missing.  Some mufassireen postulated what the missing response would be, all of them similar in meaning to “If you are God-fearing, you would get away from me or leave me alone.” Yet at-Tantawi’s tafsir mentions something more comprehensive than that. The response is missing because it applies in a general way to all bad things that could come into someone’s mind. So basically, if you are God-fearing, you would seek to abstain from all that which is the wrong, and do the right thing. Imam Ar-Razi states that the stranger would not be able to benefit from her seeking refuge from him, unless he was God-fearing. So in this statement, is a du`a’for herself related to a reminder to him of her reliance on Allah, as well as an implicit command for him to fear Allah and act accordingly. Later scholars would say in this statement is an evidence that, only a person who has taqwa can benefit from commands and prohibitions. So for the one who calls to Allah, they should call first to taqwa, first to developing a relationship with Allah, and then to the dos and don’ts of Islam.

2. Da`wah through personal example and whole-hearted concern

When she reached a stage where she feared her pregnancy would show, she went away, to a place referred to as “makaanan qaseeyyaa”—that is a place far away, distant, remote. We have to imagine that she spent time in this place all by herself—living for months with this secret that she could tell no one about. While some tafasir say that Mariam’s sister, the wife of Zakariyyah, knew about her pregnancy as she was pregnant with Yahya at the time, other tafasir reject this notion, as the evidence for this is not sound on a number of levels (Tafsir Ibn Kathir). Also, to keep in mind that she would not have been delivering her child all by herself if her family knew. So, put yourself as a sister in her shoes. How alone would you feel to have to run away to a remote place, not able to confide in anyone? In these times, she relied on Allah (swt) Himself, and she delivered her baby by herself. Mothers who have experienced delivery could never imagine experiencing this event completely alone. In this state, she exclaims:

“I wish I had died before this and was in oblivion, forgotten.” (Qur’an, 19:23)

Yet, this is not because of the pain of delivery. Her statement “been a thing forgotten” is not referring to physical pain, but rather her reputation. Tafsir al-Qurtobi mentions that the word “nasyan” means something low and trivial such that it would be easily left behind, forgotten, lost without anyone caring or remembering. It is from this description that we know Mariam (as) was not wishing for death because of the pain of delivery. Sheikh at-Tantawi adds that whoever holds that opinion has a bad suspicion of Mariam (as) as her iman was greater than that. Rather she wanted to be “forgotten” for a greater purpose. She comes from the House of ‘Imran. Her brother-in-law is the Prophet Zakariyya, the father of Yahya. This means she represented the home of prophethood, of defining religion itself for her people. So she was worried, in this moment, that when she would appear before her people with a son, they would remember her position, and think badly about her deen (Tafsir ash-Shaukani) and thus the deen of Allah (swt). Subhan’Allah, she would rather have died than make Islam look bad. I need not list the ways in which this concept can be wholesale neglected in our community. Instead, let us focus inwardly and ask, how much do we really care about our role in the da`wah of Islam? Do we care enough for it to abandon the bad speech, manners, and characteristics we may have that really turns people off from learning more? Are we dedicated enough to seek personal change? Subhan’Allah, a brother from Tajikistan once told some other students (of a different background) who were badly misbehaving at al-Azhar, “If we behaved like you do in Russia, no one would accept Islam.” No one is exempt from the reflection needed to purify manners and character, not even students of al-Azhar. May Allah (swt) allow us to have the heart of Mariam (as) in caring for the da`wah of His deen. May Allah (swt) allow us to never be a fitna (trial) in the guidance of others.

It might seem problematic at first to see a great figure in Islam wishing for death. Al-Aloosi mentions that the Prophet  taught us:

“None of you should wish for death because of some harm that has befallen you. But if one must wish, let them say ‘Oh Allah allow me to live so long as life is good for me, and allow me to die when death is good for me.’”

Yet Mariam’s wish for death still does not fall into the “makruh” (disliked) category, as she was not responding to some harm imposed on her. Rather, she was afraid of causing harm to the faith of others. This type of worry in fulfilling one’s responsibilities to Allah (swt) and not failing, is according to Imam ar-Razi, the habit of the Saliheen (righteous people). He cites the examples of Abu Bakr (ra) who wished he was the fruit that birds ate, Umar (ra) who wished he was nothing at all, and Ali (ra) at the Battle of the Camel who wished he had died twenty years earlier. Because it is a religious matter, according to al-Aloosi, there is nothing makruh in it. Rather, it is a good thing for a person who holds responsibility or is given leadership, especially during challenging times, to be deeply worried about answering to Allah (swt) and fulfilling the trust given to them.

Al-Aloosi also mentioned that Mariam (as) feared the entire community would fall into sin, as slander and gossip would spread, and she didn’t want to provoke her people into harming themselves. Through this understanding, we realize that Mariam (as) also truly worried about her peoples’ condition, and not simply her own blame. Subhan’Allah, even Jibreel whom she thought was a stranger up to no good from her people, she cared enough for to remind him of Ar-Rahman. The lesson for the Islamic worker is clear: You can never help a people you do not care about. Muslim or non-Muslim, whomever you are seeking to call, you must begin with your own heart, by developing genuine and sincere care for their condition.

3. Da`wah as expressed in chastity and personal sacrifice

Allah (swt) mentions about Mariam (as):

“And [mention] the one who guarded her chastity, so We blew into her [garment] through Our angel [Gabriel], and We made her and her son a sign for the worlds.”(Qur’an, 21:91)

“And [the example of] Mary, the daughter of ‘Imran, who guarded her chastity, so We blew into [her garment] through Our angel, and she believed in the words of her Lord and His scriptures and was of the devoutly obedient.” (Qur’an, 66:12)

I mention these verses for us to reflect on a few points. Mariam (as) was chosen to be a sign for everyone, all people, all times. When she was given her task, she fully accepted it, believed in the words of Allah (swt) and served her role obediently. Her test was not just that she would give birth to `Isa (as) while she is unmarried. Her test also included, not being married at a time that she most probably really wanted to be. The verses emphasize her chastity, which Zamakhshari describes as a “full complete chastity from the haram and even the halal.” For those brothers and sisters who are tested with being single at a time when they would want to be married, remember Mariam (as) who had patience and acceptance for what was written for her. Obviously, this doesn’t mean don’t actively seek marriage, as marriage is from the encouraged Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad . It means, so long as it is still unwritten for you, and Mr. or Mrs. Right has yet to be found, do not blame your destiny. Do not blame Allah (swt). Rather, be like Mariam (as), believe in His words, His Book, and be ever more obedient.  Realize that Mariam (as) may have also been lonely, especially as a single mother who is being accused by her people. But also realize her reward in being the best woman in Paradise.  Just as her chastity makes `Isa (as)’s birth a sign for all, the chastity and modesty of our single brothers and sisters, makes Islam a sign for all. Though we will explore the character and modesty of Mariam (as) in depth in Part Four of this series, let us remember here that the Prophet Muhammad  once said:

“Every religion has a distinct characteristic, and the distinct characteristic of Islam is modesty.” (al-Bayhaqi, Ibn Majah and in Malik’s Muwatta)

Furthermore Mariam (as) sacrificed, giving her whole self to the service of Allah (swt), and being a sign for His deen. In a world that makes romance a false idol, with movie lines about “dying for you” and “living for you” it becomes easy to lose perspective. Marriage in and of itself is not an end, but rather a means to an end. We have countless examples of amazing figures in our history who never got the opportunity to experience marriage: Imam Nawawi, Jamaal al-Din al-Afghani, Syed Qutb, to name a few. There are also those who put other priorities before marriage, like Ustaadha Zainab al-Ghazzali who stipulated the conditions of her da`wah in her marriage contract and Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal who delayed marriage until he was 40 years old because he feared it would distract him from his studies. In all of these cases, these figures were able to live very fulfilling lives because their ultimate goal was Allah (swt) Himself. Notice also that these people were very accomplished as they were busy in working, helping people, studying, and teaching. Married or un-married, the life of Mariam (as) shows us all that there is One worth living and sacrificing for, only One who truly owns our hearts.

5. Da`wah in one of its greatest forms: Motherhood/Parenting

We mentioned previous examples of un-married people who devoted themselves to the service of Allah through working, helping people, studying, and teaching. Mariam (as) was also a teacher as she was the mother of the Prophet `Isa (as). Indeed motherhood, and parenting in general, is one of the most amazing forms of Da`wah that can be experienced in this life. While new moms sometimes express feelings of inadequacy due to lessened community activism, or lessened studies, in reality they do a job that is so great, its true appreciation can only become manifest in al-Akhirah, as Allah (swt) knows intimately the patient perseverance of mothers:

“Indeed, the patient will be given their reward without measure!” (Qur’an, 39:10)

Even though people everywhere realize the significance of a mother’s role, its continuous hard work and non-stop schedule of self-sacrifice, socially, it still does not enjoy the esteem or support it deserves. This is not to exclude fathers in any way as many times in the Muslim community, the role of motherhood is heavily praised and emphasized, only to completely ignore the concept of “fatherhood” and perhaps even justify damaging imbalances in the home. While this is a topic that deserves an article on its own, I encourage our male readers to reflect on parenting and fatherhood, through the discussion of Mariam (as) as a mother. For those of you who are young or un-married, this discussion is for you too! Imam Siraj Wahhaj once said, “You actually start raising your children when you are 15 or 16, because the values you have when you are that age, is what you pass on to your future children.”

Mariam (as) was a great mother, and the daughter of a great mother. Tarbiya (the process of self-development) is something that gets passed down from one mentor to the next. Allah (swt) mentions in the Quran:

“When the wife of ‘Imran said, “My Lord, indeed I have pledged to You what is in my womb, consecrated [for Your service], so accept this from me. Indeed, You are the Hearing, the Knowing. But when she delivered her, she said, “My Lord, I have delivered a female.” And Allah was most knowing of what she delivered, “And the male is not like the female. And I have named her Mary, and I seek refuge for her in You and [for] her descendants from Satan, the expelled [from the mercy of Allah].” So her Lord accepted her with good acceptance and caused her to grow in a good manner…” (Qur’an, 3:35-37)

This passage has some amazing gems for those who are parents, and even those who are teachers. Mariam (as)’s mother dedicated her child to Allah (swt) while she was still in the womb. This reveals a deep recognition from the parent, that they do not own their child like a possession that they are obsessed with. Rather, the child is an independent human being, a trust from Allah (swt) that is to be cared for and nurtured so that they may live a life dedicated to Him. This single point if truly appreciated with all its implications by the parents of our communities, would eliminate a great amount of the family problems we hear about. Second, sometimes parents have an idea of what their child’s future would look like, what their career should be, what family they would marry from, etc. They usually have good intentions. But again, children are not possessions, and Allah (swt) may have a different plan for the child than the one intended by the parent.

In the story of Mariam (as), her mother thought she would have a boy who would serve his whole life in Bayt al-Maqdis. Instead she had a girl, whose role would be very different than what could have ever been imagined, one that only a woman could do: being a single mother of a great Prophet. When Mariam (as)’s mother realizes that Allah (swt) has given her a female, something she had not planned for, she makes du`a’ that Allah protects her and her progeny from the Shaytan. In the end, that is the primary concern for any good parent: that whatever their child ends up doing in life, they are on a path that Allah (swt) is pleased with, and far from the evils of the Shaytan. Sometimes, it can be easy to forget the primary concern for secondary concerns. Parents might pressure their children to marry people who do not lead very morally conscious lives, but they happen to come from the same ethnicity. They might encourage their children to take some career that makes a lot of money but offers no sense of purpose or gratification through meaningful efforts. They might emphasize physical appearance over spiritual development. From this wise du`a’ of Mariam’s mother, we learn something crucial in da`wah and teaching: You pass on the values you actually practice. Allah (swt) says in the verse that “He accepted her with a good acceptance, and caused her to grow in a good manner.” The wife of ‘Imran’s good intentions and du`a’s are answered, and Mariam (as) was raised well.

When Mariam (as) becomes a mother, she is alone, exhausted, and without aid. Allah (swt) says:

And shake toward you the trunk of the palm tree; it will drop upon you ripe, fresh dates. (Qur’an, 19:25)

It is not enough for one who is facing challenges to simply have tawakkul (trust in Allah). This verse shows us that Allah (swt) also wants us to put forth our best effort. As the mufassireen mentioned, how can anyone imagine shaking the trunk of a tree, and a date-palm at that? Yet, as Allah (swt) has power over all things, any of our efforts are similarly symbolic evidences that we are actively trying our best to fulfill our trusts. And though our human efforts have shortcomings that we consciously recognize, like a human hand trying to shake the trunk of a palm tree, Allah (swt) is the One who brings success, and still blesses us with an abundance of fruits. For parents, teachers, and Islamic workers, this is a rule one must remember when becoming overwhelmed. Allah (swt) is simply asking us to try our best. The most successful people, even in this life, are those who did the most with what they had and what they knew. We also take the rule that in order for a parent to help their child, they must first help themselves. Personal maintenance on basic levels is a necessary pre-requisite in maintaining someone else. And finally, sometimes a person feels like they are “behind” or “left behind,” as Mariam (as) may have felt. But so long as you keep trying, you are still present and pushing forward, you have not failed.

When she is physically rejuvenated, she has to face her fears in silence! Allah (swt) mentions:

Say, ‘Indeed, I have vowed to the Most Merciful abstention, so I will not speak today to [any] man.’ Then she brought him to her people, carrying him. They said, “O Mary, you have certainly done a thing unprecedented. O sister of Aaron, your father was not a man of evil, nor was your mother unchaste.” So she pointed to him. They said, “How can we speak to one who is in the cradle a child?”(Qur’an, 19:26-29)

Something amazing in these verses, is that Mariam (as) actually brings `Isa to the people. She initiates the dreaded encounter. She had to because this was the way for the people to be acquainted with the sign of Allah (swt). We learn from her action to have courage over fear when we are standing for the truth, seeking our confidence from our relationship with Allah (swt).

Mariam (as)’s obedience to Allah supersedes her natural maternal instinct. As Allah (swt) orders her to stay silent when the people ask her about Isa (as), she resists the temptation to defend herself and her son. There are times when a mother’s protective instinct and the laws of Islam come head to head. The successful mother is she who loves Allah (swt) more than she loves herself and her family, such that she allows her devotion towards Allah to guide her motherhood, rather than allowing her motherhood to limit her devotion. Finally, if we contemplate the role of `Isa (as) in our past and future, we cannot help but also appreciate the role of Mariam (as) in nurturing his historic personality. Remember that Mariam (as) is the mother of the one who said:

“[Jesus] said, “Indeed, I am the servant of Allah. He has given me the Scripture and made me a prophet. And He has made me blessed wherever I am and has enjoined upon me prayer and zakah as long as I remain alive. And [made me] dutiful to my mother, and He has not made me a wretched tyrant. And peace is on me the day I was born and the day I will die and the day I am raised alive.” (Qur’an, 19:30-33)

From Mariam (as), we learn what it really means to be a mother for the sake of Allah (swt).

Conclusion

The lessons we can take from the story of Mariam (as) in da`wah are so many, this article barely scratched the surface. A caller to having Taqwa and hope in the Rahma of Allah (swt), her genuine concern for the reputation of Islam, the condition of her people, and their guidance; her life of chastity and sacrifice, and her courageous motherhood provide us with gems to live by. May Allah (swt) help us to emulate the important lessons we take from our dear beloved Mariam (as).

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV

Our second lesson: Mariam (as) had a deep spiritual relationship with Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala – exalted is He).  We see in her example how a mind, body, and soul can be spiritually dedicated to Him. As we examine these elements, we also see how Allah (swt) rewards and honors her. As such, Mariam’s spiritual journey reveals significant spiritual pillars for those who seek to be rewarded and honored by Allah (swt).

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1. Tawakkul during Tribulations

From her younger years as a student to her trials later on in life, we witness Mariam (as) in a constant state of tawakkul (trust in Allah).  From hiding the test of her pregnancy, to delivering `Isa (as) on her own, to keeping silent while her infant (who according to at-Tabari was just forty days old) spoke to defend her honor, we feel her powerful dependence on Allah (swt) revealed. We also learn that there are some tests, where one may find no available human support for the struggle to do that which is right, which is closer to piety. In this scenario, Mariam provides us with a glimpse into the power of trusting Allah (swt). `Isa (as) speaking from the cradle was an amazing and unexpected blessing for Mariam, relieving her of the trial that she had endured, providing proof of her innocence:

“Then she pointed to him. They said: “How can we talk to one who is a child in the cradle?” He [Isa] said: “Verily! I am a slave of Allah, He has given me the Scripture and made me a Prophet. And He has made me blessed wherever I be…” (Qur’an, 19:29-31)

Subhan’Al­­­­lah, in the lives of the righteous, many times mu’jizaat (miracles to Prophets) and kiramaat (miracles to non-Prophets), are granted during a period of trial, where the struggle to stay steadfast was rewarded with the relief that only Allah (swt) brings.

And yet we also take from Mariam’s case that her devotion is not only rewarded with relief, but also with success. Today, she is the most honored woman in human history, and she is the greatest woman in al-Akhirah (the Hereafter). Subhan’Allah, one can only begin to imagine what her heart endured for the sake of Allah (swt). Her story is a shining example of the promise:

“Truly the end is for the God-Conscious.” (Qur’an, 11:49)

2. Solitude with Allah

Her spirituality is also embodied in her khalwa (solitude) with Allah (swt). Like her mother and father, she was a devout worshiper who always sought to increase her closeness to her Lord. Allah described that He

“…accepted her with a goodly acceptance…” (Qur’an, 3:37)

Ibn Ashur comments that this is His acceptance of her service to Bayt Al-Maqdis, which is something no other woman was legally granted permission to do before her. He also mentions that the word mihrab comes from the word harb, meaning war. Thus the mihrab was understood as a place where one worships in solitude, waging war against the temptations and whispers of Shaytan. It is a place of introspection, reflection, prayer, learning and du`a’ (supplication). While the masajid we have today are also a place for these things, how often do we really go there to make i’tikaaf (spiritual seclusion)? Sisters, i’tikaaf is for us as well. And alhamdulillah (all praise is due to Allah) in America, the masajid are more female-friendly and stay open. When your iman (faith) needs a boost, remember Mariam, and try to pray Fajr in the masjid, stay a few hours and experience the sweetness of khalwa with Allah (swt). For those who are able to in their homes, also consider creating a musalah area that is only used the way one uses a masjid: a place for prayer, dhikr (remembrance), studying the Qur’an and other beneficial readings, tafakkur (deep contemplation), etc. Sometimes when the heart aches, one reaches for unhealthy distractions and the pain goes away temporarily. When the distraction is gone, the pain returns because our hearts are actually thirsty for being with Allah (swt), and the thirst was not quenched by the distractions. Rather, the thirst grew stronger and the pain increased. In Mariam we see how training the self to have khalwa with Allah (swt) helps the heart to endure and stay strong. We also see how having a special space allotted for this solitude can serve one well on the spiritual journey.

3. Appreciating Allah’s Divine Attributes

Mariam (as) also reflected an appreciation for the Attributes of Allah (swt). Her expression of iman is very practical. Allah (swt) says:

“Every time he (Zakariyah) entered al-Mihrab to (visit) her, he found her supplied with sustenance. He said, “Oh Mariam, from where have you gotten this?” She said, “This is from Allah. Verily Allah provides sustenance to whom He wills without limit.” (Qur’an, 3:37)

The scholars differ over whether the part of the verse, “Verily, Allah provides sustenance to whom He wills without limit,” is also from what Mariam said or if it is a new sentence in which Allah (swt) is addressing the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. Imam Al Aloosi adds that the former opinion is the more correct one.

At least five different books of tafsir mention a hadith of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ where he is with Fatima, and she brings him a full pot of meat and bread, at a time when there was very little food in the house. When he asks her from where she had gotten this food, she replies, “This is from Allah. Verily Allah provides sustenance to whom He wills without limit.” At this response, the Prophet ﷺ praises Fatima and says, “Alhamdulilah for He who made you like the best woman of Bani Isra’el (Mariam)!” (Narrated from Abu Ya ‘la)

The amazing point to take from Mariam’s response to Zakariyah (as), is that as she recognized Allah (swt)’s ultimate power and control over her sustenance, she also inspired a prophet! When the Prophet Zakariyah hears her response he supplicates to Allah asking for a son. The verse starts with “hunaalika”—he makes du`a’ on the spot!

“In that same place, Zachariah prayed unto his Sustainer, saying: “O my Sustainer! Bestow upon me [too], out of Your grace, the gift of goodly offspring; for You, indeed, hear all prayers.”(Qur’an, 3:38)

If Ar-Razzaq (the Supreme Provider) can provide Mariam with the fruits of the summer at winter time and the fruits of the winter at summer time (Tafsir Ibn Kathir), He can also provide Zakariyah (as), a very old man, with a son. How many times are we asked about our provisions and possessions, and how often do our answers reflect our deep belief that they are ultimately blessings given to us from Allah (swt)? How beautiful that such a wise answer would give others renewed hope in Allah (swt) in receiving those things they desire and hold dear! From Mariam we appreciate how a genuine personal example in knowing Allah (swt) is a potent da`wah (invitation), such that even a Prophet would benefit from it.

4. Submission in Prayer

Allah (swt) also commands Mariam toward developing her relationship with Him:

“Oh Mariam, submit yourself with obedience to your Lord and prostrate yourself and bow down along with the Raki’een (those who bow down).” (Qur’an, 3:43)

In this command for Mariam to observe prayer, Allah (swt) mentions the parts of the prayer rather than simply the command to pray, and mentions the sujood (prostration) before the ruku’ (bowing). Imam Al-Alusi explains that some scholars believed in the precedence of sujood over ruku’ in the verse, as sujood is the most important cornerstone of the prayer, and it is the most humble human position, as well as the point at which the Muslim is closest to Him. Both ruku’ and sujood are symbolic of one’s physical submission to the Creator. The spiritual relationship is not just an act of the heart, but also one of the limbs. Also, this verse is an evidence for the fact that prayer did not start with the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. Rather, it was the practice of all the Prophets and righteous people in our history.

As Allah (swt) called on Mariam to draw close to Him in prayer, He describes her response:

“…she was of the Qaniteen (obedient).” (Qur’an, 66:12)

5. Responding to the Mention of Allah (swt)

Can you imagine the state of Mariam’s heart when she was informed by the angels that Allah (swt) has addressed her by name and commanded her by name to pray to Him? What about the condition of our hearts as Allah (swt) also addresses us as a group by name to do the same!

“Oh you who believe! Seek help through patience and prayer.” (Qur’an, 2:153)

Any time we see a verse start with “Oh you who believe!” we should check our hearts as these verses are calling us out by name, the Ummah of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. Will it be recorded in our book of deeds that we were of the Qaniteen (those obedient to Allah)? It is interesting to note that we always benefit in multiple ways when we obey the commands of Allah (swt). In prayer, we find a place of help. Stress is relieved. Sins are prevented. Iman is tasted. Du`a’ are answered. Hearts are softened. Forgiveness is granted… How Merciful is the One who obligated goodness and benefit on us?! How do we feel when we remember that this obligation was given to us in the Heavens. And in the Heavens, in a very special space, in a conversation between only the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ and Allah, we were mentioned as well! And this moment of mention, is itself mentioned every time we pray and sit for the tashaahud, as we say “Wa salaamu alayna ala ibaadullah as-Saliheen!” (And peace be upon us, the righteous servants of Allah!)

Perhaps we can compare our hearts to another great woman of Paradise, Khadijah (ra) whose name was also mentioned by Allah (swt). We see in her response, a heart that wants to be mentioned by Allah (swt), and thereafter is overflowing towards Him.

One day, Jibril came down and told the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ to convey the peace and blessings of Allah to Khadija. Hearing this, Khadijah (ra) exclaimed, “Did Allah mention my name, Oh Prophet of Allah?!” When the Prophet ﷺ said yes, she was so elated that she said, “And unto Allah be all the blessings and peace!” (Bukhari)

Subhan’Allah, what would we do, how far would we go, just to have our Creator mention our specific names and say He is pleased with us? The way He mentioned Mariam (as), and Khadijah (ra), we too can be mentioned by Him!

We know from the famous hadith qudsi, Allah (swt) Himself says as related by the Prophet ﷺ:

“I am as My servant thinks I am. I am with him when he makes mention of Me. If he makes mention of Me to himself, I make mention of him to Myself. And if he makes mention of Me in a gathering, I make mention of him in a gathering greater than it.” (Bukhari)

One of the ways we can have our names mentioned by Allah (swt) is through dhikr (remembrance), as well as by joining study circles and gatherings where His name is being mentioned.

Abu Hurairah and Abu Sa`id Al-Khudri (may Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “When a group of people assemble for the remembrance of Allah, the angels surround them (with their wings), (Allah’s) mercy envelops them, tranquility descends upon them and Allah makes a mention of them before those who are near Him.” [Muslim].

Abu Hurairah also reported from the Prophet ﷺ a conversation that happens between the angels and Allah (swt) when people gather to remember Him and ask His forgiveness. For these people, Allah (swt) says, “I call you to witness that I hereby grant pardon to them and confer upon them what they ask for; and grant them protection against what they seek protection from.” One of the angels says, “Our Lord, there is amongst them such and such slave who does not belong to the assembly of those who are participating in Your remembrance. He passed by them and sat down with them.” He says, “I also grant him pardon because they are the people by virtue of whom their associates will not be unfortunate’.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Sometimes we forego the opportunity to sit in a halaqa (study-circle) or lecture thinking the information may not be new, but we forget that such a gathering is what the angels search for so they may join and tell our Creator what was said, and the names of those who listened. Such a gathering would be the reason for Allah (swt) Himself to mention our names and forgive us!

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When I ask myself, “What would Mariam do in her spiritual relationship with Allah (swt)?” there is so much to reflect on and take lessons from. She persevered in her trials armed with tawakkul. She enjoyed khalwa (solitude) with Allah (swt) in the masjid for different types of ibadah. She appreciated the Attributes of Allah (swt) such that her iman illuminated the hopes of her teacher, a Prophet. She was steadfast in her prayers and obedient to Allah’s commands. She did those things that allowed her name to be mentioned by the Only One Whose mention is truly worth striving for.

May Allah (swt) enable us to benefit from her mention in the Qur’an such that we too would be mentioned by Him. May we seek the enjoyment of khalwa, ibadah, salah, and tawakkul. May Allah inspire us to turn towards Him, on the spot, with a renewed sense of hope as Prophet Zakariyah (as) did. May we be recorded with Mariam (as) and the Qaniteen. Ameen.