By Umm Ameen

Alhamdulillah (praise be to God) my husband and I were blessed with the opportunity to perform Hajj in 2014.  Deciding to go to Hajj was one of the most difficult decisions I ever had to make since becoming a mother. As a homeschooler and protective mother who is a firm believer in attachment parenting, family and friends were shocked when I shared our Hajj plans. A dear, genuinely concerned friend asked, “How do you expect to leave your baby for so long during Hajj when you couldn’t even leave her with me for three minutes without worrying so much?” My response: “When I left her with you to quickly run to my car, I wasn’t leaving her for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He).” As I uttered these words, I shook inside with gratitude toward Allah for guiding me to that realization at that specific moment. Another friend encouragingly reminded me that I am going for my children and was not depriving them in any way. Now that I’ve returned from the amazing journey, I realize that performing Hajj while leaving my little children at home was the best thing I’ve ever done for them. Please pray that Allah (swt) accepts my Hajj and invites me again and again.

I’d like to share some ideas that helped my children before and during my journey. I pray that these ideas will inspire, encourage, and give hope to other mothers contemplating Hajj insha’Allah (God willing).

1. Make du`a’, du`a’, and more du`a’ (supplication) for your children and for Allah to make the separation easy on them and you. Since the inception of our Hajj plans (at least 8 months before Hajj 2014), I started asking Allah (swt) to guide me towards making a decision that was the most pleasing to Him and the best for my deen (religion), dunya (worldly life), and akhirah (hereafter). I performed istikharah (a specific prayer and supplication asking God for guidance) and immediately saw events unfolding in favor of me going for Hajj. I continued to make du`a’ (supplication) imploring Allah to take care of my children in my absence and admitted that it was He, not me, who has been the one taking care of them even in my presence since before their conception! During Hajj, I undoubtedly missed my children tremendously. I made it a point to make du`a’ for them every single time I thought of them. Alhamdulillah, I have no regrets there. May Allah accept all those prayers!

2. Break the news to your children gently in an easy way for them to understand. I decided to hold off on any Hajj related discussions with the children until after Ramadan 2014. One night, as I was tucking them into bed, it just felt like an appropriate time to break the news. The words naturally rolled off my tongue, and alhamdulillah Allah made it easy for me wherein I didn’t cry or express any hesitation whilst talking to my older two. I remember sharing something like, “You know that no matter how much I love reading to you and playing with you, when it’s time for salah (prayer) I drop everything and pray, right? Allah is above everything, and our duty towards Him comes first. Just like salah is a pillar of Islam, so is Hajj. Did you know that this year Allah has invited Mamma and Baba to perform Hajj? Do you know what that means? It means that insha’Allah Baba and I will be going to Makkah for a few days. Hajj is too difficult for children and it’s not safe for me to take the baby so alhamdulillah we’re so lucky that Nanna and Abba will be staying here with you. Isn’t that exciting? It’s going to be so much fun for you! Baba and I are going to make lots and lots of du`a’ for you while we’re there insha’Allah. Do you have any special du`a’ that you want me to make on your behalf?” The children took the news very well alhamdulillah; coincidentally, they even attended a children’s Hajj Simulation at a local mosque the day we departed on our journey.

3. Plan countdown surprises and notes to keep them feeling loved, reassured, and entertained. Our trip was a total of seventeen days. For each day, I had a little gift bag for my children to open. I numbered each gift bag and hung them high on a wall from 17 to 1. This line of gift bags served as a countdown for Mamma and Baba to return. The gift bags contained little items that I carefully chose knowing that they would make the children happy: yo-yos, fancy pencils, whistles, magnifying glasses, bouncing balls, etc. My husband and I also wrote little notes in each bag addressing our children. One note read: “Dear Bhaijaan and Didi, We are so lucky to have you in our lives. Please give your baby sister a hug and kiss from us and play ‘catch, catch, catch’ with her today.” I was told that the children enthusiastically awoke every morning begging an adult to bring down their gift bag. Alhamdulillah.

4. Record videos of yourself for your kids. My husband and I recorded ourselves reading aloud our children’s favorite books. We must have had a total of four to five hours of reading their all-time favorite picture and chapter books. We recorded these videos using our webcams and spent about thirty minutes each night after the children went to bed. During our read aloud sessions, we would pause and “talk” directly to our children commenting, questioning, or reflecting upon the happenings in the book. For example, when a character screamed, “I am all alone!”, I paused and told my children to remember that no matter what, they will never be all alone because Allah (swt) is always with them. Recording these books was a very powerful experience for me and sometimes brought tears to my eyes. I had to re-do my one year old’s favorite book three times since I cried every time I tried to record myself reading to her. Alhamdulillah my children absolutely loved watching the videos, and it was great “baby sitting” for the grandparents when they needed a break. My children still view the videos and thoroughly enjoy them when I’m out running errands, busy with the baby, or performing other household chores. I recently played a recorded book while I busily worked around the house. I grinned from ear to ear upon hearing my daughter responding out loud to the questions that I had posed while my son gently reminded her that “Mamma can’t hear you when she’s in that video.” These videos were a lifetime investment, alhamdulillah, and I totally recommend them to everyone.

5. Buy and wrap `Eid gifts to make their `Eid fun and joyful. I couldn’t imagine my children spending `Eid without their parents, but of course they had a blast with their grandparents and their favorite uncle. Prior to leaving, I bought them special `Eid gifts and wrapped them. My mom surprised them with the gifts on `Eid day and sent me pictures. My family and friends also generously showered the children with gifts.

6. Organize play dates with friends in advance. Alhamdulillah I’m blessed with a beautiful community filled with friends who are eager to please Allah (swt). I requested my trusted friends to take my older two for a few hours every day. The children went on field trips, carnivals, Qur’an class, friends’ homes, etc. They had so much fun every day masha’Allah to the point where I was convinced that I surely missed them way more than they missed me. Alhamdulillah this also gave my parents more time to focus on the toddler who stayed in their warm and loving care 24/7.

7. Have extra toys in case all else fails. I ordered some educational toys and hid them in the garage. My mom knew where they were and would use them as needed. I think she introduced a new toy/activity every four or five days.

8. Make a calendar for the kids to keep them excited and informed. I replicated a calendar on a poster and listed all the dates and days of the week that we’d be gone for. Under each day, I wrote the special activity that the children would be involved in on that day. Entries such as Sky Zone with Mamu, Zoo Day, Play date with Abdur Rahman, Sports Class, Mamma and Baba Return, etc. kept the children excited and informed.

Alhamdulillah I am so grateful to Allah (swt) for inviting me to Hajj and making it so easy. Reflecting back, I was definitely more nervous and anxious than needed. My children were not affected negatively in any way at all and our relationship only grew stronger. The du`a’ that I made for them during Hajj are priceless and made it totally worth leaving them. I had initially contemplated going when the children were much older and independent. However, I now honestly and confidently recommend going as early as possible during your youth so that you can make du`a’ for your children now, and they can start reaping the benefits of the special heartfelt prayers that YOU, their loving mother, made for them when you first saw the Ka`bah, or when you were standing on Arafat, or while gazing at the stars in Muzdalifah. Imagine the power of those du`a’! The du`a’ of a mother who sacrificed so much, put her Lord before her children, and chose to accept His invitation to perform Hajj. I also constantly reminded myself that I may not live another year for another chance. Hajj is something I had to do, not just for my children, but for myself. May Allah accept and invite me again and again.

If you have any additional ideas, please share!

Do you want your kids to love the Qur’an? Do you want them to look forward to attending Qur’an classes? One of the most frequent complaints I hear from children is that they find the Qur’an boring. Upon listening to their objections, I realize that the source of their boredom and frustration lies in their parental figure/mentor/teacher having no idea how to be an effective teacher. These children share with me what many adult versions of these kids vent to me about: As adults, they want to love the Qur’an, they want to read it, but they have a psychological barrier they cannot surmount because for them, the Qur’an reminds them of being yelled at, being forced to sit in a corner and memorize words they never understood, mean teachers who never smiled, parents who were angry because they did not memorize well enough, and never any fun.

Yes, we must teach our children how to respect the Qur’an, but respect does not necessitate solemn experiences. We want our children to LOVE the Qur’an; we want them to grown into adults who find the Qur’an to be their best friends. To help develop that relationship, sometimes the best way for children to find the Qur’an meaningful is to build a relationship with it as they build relationships with friends. Through play, games and activities, children develop bonds with one another; why not allow them to experience the same fun and exciting friendship with the Qur’an?

The following are suggestions on how to teach the Qur’an in fun and exciting ways. The curriculum was created for the awesome Camp Izza, a camp in which children often entered Qur’an class saying, “This is the first time I find Qur’an fun!” and, “Finally!! Time for Qur’an class!” Understand that Qur’an class was being compared to a full day of games and activities, so these statements are quite weighty. To learn more about Camp Izza please visit www.campizza.com.

These activities are geared towards children memorizing smaller portions at a time and whose ages span from elementary through early middle school. Adaptations may work for older children. A modification for children not yet in elementary school is mentioned at the end.

Party for the Quran!!!

Objective: Get kids SUPER excited about the Quran and loving it.

Needed: Any materials desired for the party.

Suggestions for pre-party: Have a conversation about why the Quran is amazing, what it is and why we love it. Excitedly share that we will throw a party for the Qur’an. Help kids think of ideas to make the party fun. Ensure kids are doing most of the talking and that the parent/mentor/teacher is only facilitating the discussion.

Pre-party Activity Suggestions: Have kids draw pictures for the Quran. Encourage them to be as creative as they desire. Put pictures up around the room. Kids who finish drawing can get into groups and put together a skit/song/anything else they creatively think up for the Qur’an. Put up decorations, buy party food/dessert, play nasheeds, etc. Buy small bubble containers kids can use to blow bubbles around the room.

Once kids are all ready, have them hide in different places of the room to “surprise” the Quran as it walks in.

Party Time: Parent/teacher/mentor should stand outside the room with the Qur’an, knock on the door and say, “The Qur’an is coming in!” As it walks in with the parent, all kids shout, “Surprise!!!” and blow bubbles around the room to welcome the Mushaf. The Mushaf should be walked around the room so all kids get to interact with it by blowing bubbles on it and feeling excited about seeing it. Then, have all groups perform what they prepared for the Qur’an. This is a GREAT way to get every age group super excited about the Qur’an, insha’Allah (God willing).

Quran Freeze Tag

Needed: Open area, Players, Qur’anic verses

Following the traditional game of freeze tag, one or more individuals are picked to be “it” and chase the other players in the game. If someone who is ‘it’ tags another player, that player must stand frozen in place. The person who is tagged should stand frozen with their hand held up high so other players know they need to untag him/her. When someone comes to untag the frozen person, the frozen person must recite the portion of the Qur’an they are working on memorizing for that period to the person who untagged them. During this time, none of those deemed ‘it’ are allowed to touch either of these two players and can only chase them again after they have finished and are back in the game. Players should all hold papers containing the portion of the Qur’an they are working on memorizing so that they can read it when untagged.

(Note: This game is better played if the portion of verses are not too many or difficult for the kids to recite. Before the game begins, parent/mentor/teacher should recite the verses with the children or give them some time to practice so that by the time they play Qur’an Freeze Tag they will already know how to recite the verses on their own. Provide slips of paper with the verses written on them so the kids can keep them in their pockets or in their hands so they can look at them when they are being unfrozen.]

Qur’an Hot Potato:

Needed: Stereo/MP3 player/speakers + nasheed, Item to be the ‘hot potato’ [ie: Ball]

One individual to control the nasheed, Players

Sitting in a circle, players listen to a nasheed while passing around a ball. Someone should be controlling the nasheed and stopping it at random. This person should not be looking at the circle as to ensure the process remains random. Players in the circle pass around a ball [or any other item] while the nasheed plays. When the nasheed is momentarily stopped, the person holding the ball in that moment is out and must sit in the “Pot of Awesomeness.” When someone gets into the “Pot of Awesomeness,” those remaining in the circle should say vigorously pound their fists on the floor twice while shouting, “Subhan’Allah (Glory be to God)! Subhan’Allah!” The person/people in the “Pot of Awesomeness” throw their fists in the air and scream back, “Allahu Akbar (God is Great)! Allahu Akbar!” (This is an essential part of the game to help ensure those who are “out” still feel like they are a part of the game and are able to continue focusing on the circle even when they are out of it.)

The game continues until only one person is left in the circle and that is the round’s winner.

After every round, recite the verses being practiced for that day as a group one or more times. If there is more than one surah (chapter) being memorized by players, have each group recite their verses sequentially and encourage all players who previously have memorized the verses to also join in and recite. [Provide slips of paper with the verses written or keep the mushaf in a nearby area.]

Subhan’Allah- Subhan’Allah- Alhamdulilah [Wet/Dry versions]

Needed: Open space, players. For wet version: Bucket with water and bean bag balls to absorb water.

Following the traditional game of “Duck Duck Goose,” this game has players sitting in a circle with one player walking around and tapping the heads of other players.  The person who is ‘it’ walks around the circle and as they tap each head, they state, “Subhan’Allah,” until they eventually pick their target and shout, “Alhamdulilah (Praise be to God)!” The person who is ‘it’ and the target then run around the circle, the target chasing the person who was ‘it.’ The person who is ‘it’ must sit in the spot of the target before the target tags them. If the target tags them, the person who is ‘it’ must sit in the “Pot of Awesomeness” (See “Quran Hot Potato” for more details). Every time someone enters the “Pot of Awesomeness,” all players recite the verses they are memorizing. If there are few people entering the pot, the game may be stopped every five minutes to recite the verses all together. [Provide slips of paper with the verses written or keep the mushaf in a nearby area.]

Once the person who was ‘it’ either sits in the “Pot of Awesomeness” or in the previous spot of the target, the target now becomes the person who is ‘it’ and the game continues until all players have had a turn or until time is up.

To play this wet on hot summer days, have those who are ‘it’ grab a bean bag ball absorbed in water and squish the water on top of each player’s head or on top of the head of the person they choose as the target.

Quran Dodge Ball [Wet/Dry versions]

Needed: Open area, Players, Balls, Demarcated lines or items used to demarcate lines.

Wet version: Bucket with water and bean bag balls to absorb water.

Following the game of traditional dodge ball, players form two teams on two different sides of the lines. Once the game begins, players throw balls at other players with the objective of getting other players out. If the ball hits the body of a player on the opposite team directly, without bouncing on the floor, that player is out. If the player on the opposite team catches the ball thrown at him/her, the thrower of the ball is out. This continues until all players of one team are out and the other team wins. For wet version, use wet bean bag balls to hit players.

After every round (or every few minutes), have all players recite the verses they are memorizing as a group. [Provide slips of paper with the verses written or keep the mushaf in a nearby area.]

Qur’an Water Gun Blast

Needed: Open area, players, water guns, and water bucket/source for re-fills

Kids are divided into two different teams. They chase each other and shoot water at the opposite team members. If they squirt them directly in the chest/stomach area, the person shot is out and sits down in a side area. This continues until all members are out from one team and the other team wins. After every round (or every few minutes), have all players recite the verses they are memorizing as a group. [Provide slips of paper with the verses written or keep the mushaf in a nearby area.]

Note: For Younger Children:

Games will depend on the dynamics of the kids. The above games can work, but if there are very young kids, alternatives range from having children color or play with blocks, dolls, etc., while listening to the short surah being memorized in the background of the game. Before campers engage in any activity, have them recite the words they are working on for that day. Then, have them listen to the surah simply as they play. You will notice them eventually making out the words and reciting it in the background as they engage in their playtime. Stop them from time to time to recite the words again as a group and individually.

by Ayesha | A Nightingale

In 4th grade Islamic studies we’re finishing up a unit on Ramadan. It’s fun talking about Ramadan with my students. Their perception of Eid in school is so different from mine when I was their age.

I gave my students an assignment to write about their favorite Eid they could remember. The stories were wonderful. Now I will share my favorites with you – with the original spelling and grammar, of course!

The night before eid I got into my bed and went to sleep. The next morning my dad woke me up. I got out of bed and dressed up. And then we went to the Eid place. We made ower sallah and went with my cousin (which I allways go with). Then I went to wallmart and byed my Nintendo DS. Then we played with Omer and Ommar. Then I played with my Nintendo DS. Then we went to chaky chies. Than I went to sleep warmly. – Abdulaziz

Warmly! 🙂

On the night before my favorite Eid, I went to the Masjid and got locked in the babysitting room. Luckily, Khaled was with me. The movie that they had was boring so Khaled and I devised a plan. Khaled was going to unplug the TV after I turned off the lights. Then we would run out. It worked completely! When I got home, I was so exhausted from running so much, that the minute I got on my bed, I fell asleep. On the morning of Eid, my mom made a huge breakfast. She made pancakes, bacon, waffles, eggs, omlets, and even French toast! I was so full. In the car, my family recited the takbeer. After the sallah, six 5th graders tried to beat me up, but they couldn’t! I don’t know why though. Anayway, after that, we went to Paradise Park. That place was awsome! It had go-carts, laser tag, a trampoline, rock climbing and a huge arcade! But before we went there, we went to GameStop. There I bought Star Fox Assult and Super Mario Duluxe. After all that, I fell asleep in the car home. that was my Eid. –Amer

And one more.

One morning I got up very madly forgetting it was Eid. When my mom reminded me that it was Eid I got so happy, got dressed, woke up my sisters, ate breakfast, jumped in the car and drove to Zaynabs house. When we got there Hafsah opened the door. Hafsah and Maaria were already there. My mom and I blew balloons. Some other Muslims arrived. After that Noor and her friend Sarah arrived. Then my mom left and said Eid Mubarak to everyone. Then we ate some delicious food that Sr. Rizwana made. Then Sarah, Noor, Zaynab and I played alot of fun games in the basement. –Muneerah