In the last article, we explored how Allah (swt) exonerated Aisha radi allahu `anha (may God be please with her) and Prophet Joseph `alayhi as-salaaam (peace be upon him) from unsubstantiated and untrue gossip, and we talked about the victims of slander. Today, it’s about the perpetrators of slander. It is about, quite possibly, you and me.

Sometimes in the name of “enjoining good and forbidding evil” we forget the sanctity of our fellow human beings and especially fellow believers. We spread things that are unsubstantiated in a bid to ‘warn others’ about possible deviancy. We are harsh in our words. We assume the worst. We forget that one of the best traits a Muslim can have is “thinking well of the servant of Allah” and for other Muslims to be “safe from his hands and tongue.”

We forget that the Prophet ﷺ (peace be upon him) passed by a grave and he warned that the person was suffering in his grave because he would spread gossip. We forget that that person we are talking about may have our good deeds transferred to him simply because he is a victim of our speech.

Scary stuff? It is. The Prophet ﷺ said: “The majority of man’s sins emanate from his tongue.” (Tabarani)

To go back to the examples in our previous article, it was clear that those with power—the minister and the minister’s wife—knew the truth with regards to what was said about the Prophet Joseph (as). But they allowed the rumor to persist and put Prophet Joseph in prison. With Aisha (ra), we have even more details. The people who discussed the rumor were good Muslims. They discussed the scandalous nature of what was said, and in doing so, spread it far and wide. Shaytan created doubt: “Could it actually be true?” Allah admonished the Muslims when He informs us in the Qur’an about what happened:

“Why, when you heard it, did not the believing men and believing women think good of one another and say, ‘This is an obvious falsehood?’” (Qur’an, 24:12)

Now some people might think this example is extreme. We would never spread such a rumor. But rumors and slander and gossip come in all shapes and forms. So if you hear something about someone that is unsubstantiated, do not fuel the fire. We are just as bad as those news networks we criticize, who pick up a story, and whether true or not, run with it.

This is not intended to shut down constructive criticism of public figures. There are ways of bringing people to account. There are ways of disagreeing and critiquing ideas and views, which are beyond the scope of this article. But in the age of the internet, anyone can write a piece and within an hour it is shared and read by many. And it would do us good to reflect on what our role is in this. We must remember that we will be held to account. So let us not put ourselves in a position to be asked about why we were careless in our research, harsh in words, and negative in our basic assumptions about others.

And remember that the Prophet ﷺ taught:

“A person’s eman (faith) is not upright until his heart is upright, and his heart is not upright until his tongue is upright.” (Ahmad)

Four walls. Dark and dingy. A man sat down and exhaled, bowed his head down and said a prayer to His Lord. How did he get here?

In another time, another place, a woman wept. She couldn’t find meaningful support anywhere. She wept for so long that she felt her insides were going to explode. How did she get here?

They were both victims of a malicious rumor. A rumor that hit at their very morals and character. In his case, this misconception surrounding him lasted years. In her case, over a month, with even the closest people to her unsure what to make of what was being said.

Prophet Joseph, alayhi as salaam (peace be upon him), was innocent. But he remained in prison for years. There were murmurs of juicy gossip: “The wife of the minister fell in love with him,” “Ah but I heard he tried to seduce her!” One might be justifiably frustrated—poor Prophet Joseph spent years in prison for a lie! This is so grossly unfair, so inherently unjust.

But Allah, subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), is the All-Hearing and the All-Seeing. He is the All-Knowing, the Most-Wise. He is the Protective Friend of those who believe. And He is the Most Just.

That prison was key to Prophet Joseph’s exoneration. Had he not been in prison, the rumor might have persisted. How? Years later, he interpreted the dream of his jail-mates, and eventually word traveled to the King, who also had a dream to be interpreted. And Joseph refused to leave the prison until it was made clear that what was said about him was a lie. The wife of the minister confessed that she was the one who tried to seduce him. There was no more doubt.

And Aisha, radi Allahu `anha (may God be pleased with her), the wife of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, was also attacked. A truly filthy rumor, started by one of the hypocrites, circulated around Madina about her and a pious companion. Everyone heard about it. Those who chose to defend were few, but others were willing accomplices in their simple discussion of it. They were talking about someone’s reputation. They were allowing a rumor to persist. They were creating doubt.

Aisha actually fell ill during this period. For a whole month she had no idea what was being said about her. When she was better and finally heard, she wept for three whole days. Her illness at that time was a blessing because it protected her from the pain for some time. And in what occurred was a lesson for all the Muslims. And she too was exonerated—by verses revealed in the Holy Qur’an just for her. She was innocent, and everyone until the end of time would know it.

People might say things about you. They might be gross assumptions or outright lies. But that place you are in, as horrible as it may be, might actually be the bridge to your opening and relief. You may not be able to see it yet. Take comfort in knowing that you are in the company of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, Aisha (ra), and the Prophet Joseph (as).

And these things hurt. It is hard not to be affected by them. But in the spirit of the Prophets Muhammad and Joseph, and of Aisha, go to your Lord. Pray to Him. And continue in your work for Him. Don’t let the rumors stop you from doing good, because it is not about them. It is about you and Him. The truth is light and will overpower darkness. Those who slander may try to harm you, but when you continue in your good you have already won that battle. They could not bring you down. And Allah (swt) will cause your good to remain. The moment of pain you are in is just that—a moment. It may feel like a prison or an illness and never-ending, but Allah makes after hardship relief. And within every hardship Allah will give you ease. It may be through a friend, or perhaps a distraction. Or a reminder in the form of an article.

But just remember that Allah (swt) knows. You are not alone even if you feel abandoned and wronged. And your relief might come from where you do not expect.

—————
This is the first article in a two-part series.

“He really didn’t deserve that promotion.”

“She may act nice, but she is so two-faced.”

“Did you hear about what happened?! They got into so much trouble for those emails…”

Sound familiar? Unfortunately this is what we witness on a day-to-day basis in the workplace. It’s hard to resist just listening to others gossip, let alone joining in ourselves. As Muslims, we first need to recognize the gravity of such talk, and then try and learn from the character of the best of creation, the Prophet Muhammad (sal Allahu `alayhi wa sallam – peace be upon him).

Misuse of the Tongue

Misusing the tongue in the workplace can take many forms. It can be from telling outright lies about someone, to assuming the worst about our colleagues, to making fun of them. It is crucial to remember that the Prophet (s) said: “The majority of man’s sins emanate from his tongue.” (Tabarani)

Even if we may avoid the major sins, on the Day of Judgment we may have to face a nasty surprise: a mountain of sins, accumulated simply because of our tongues. The Prophet (s) said: “Will anything else besides (irresponsible) talk cause the people to be thrown into the Hellfire upon their faces or on their nostrils?” (Tirmidhi)

Allah (swt) has warned us in the Qur’an:

“O you who believe! Avoid much suspicion, indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear God. Verily, God is the one who accepts repentance, Most Merciful.” (49:12)

Many scholars have said that listening to others backbite is just as bad as gossiping itself, because we are approving the act. Listening to such talk affects our hearts, causing us to subconsciously start to draw conclusions about people’s characters or have negative thoughts about them simply because of what we have heard, regardless whether it is true or not.

A Test

If someone invites you to a bar to have a drink on the pretext that it will help advance your career because you’ll meet people, what do you do? You most likely will think twice, try to convince yourself that you aren’t doing anything wrong because you won’t be drinking, then (hopefully) reassess the situation and realize you shouldn’t go. You’ll remind yourself this a test, a temptation, and for the sake of Allah, you’ll do the right thing. After all, it is Allah who provides.

Gossip and backbiting in the workplace are the same. When our colleagues gossip around us, it is an implicit invitation to sin or to be a witness to sin. It is that same test: to join in or not to join in?

The Best Example

Imagine if the Prophet (s) worked where you work. Imagine if the people around him snickered at someone’s misfortune or expressed their anger at someone behind their backs. How would he be?

Once, two men were walking and talking about a man that had been punished that day for drinking wine. So one said, “Did you see how he was whipped like a dog?” The Prophet (s) heard him, and when they passed by a donkey, the Prophet (s) said “Eat.” Surprised, the men said “Why?” He said, “Because you have eaten that which is worse, you have eaten the dead flesh of your brother.”

Even though these men were not even lying, because they were degrading the man because of the events that happened that day; the Prophet (s) stopped them immediately. In an oft-repeated hadith, the Beloved (s) states, “Whoever of you sees an evil action, let him change it with his hand, and if he is not able to do so, then with his tongue, and if he is not able to do so, then with his heart – and that is the weakest of faith.” (Muslim)

Thus the first step that we should take as Muslims is precisely what the Prophet (s) did: attempt to change it with our tongues. Whoever works in a high-stress and competitive environment will know that this isn’t easy to do especially because gossiping and backbiting happen so often. However, we have to try to do so with the utmost adab (manners). This is especially important if what is being said is a lie or pure speculation, as Allah (swt) in the Qur’an has said about the incident of Al-Ifk, where the hypocrites slandered the wife of the Prophet (s), `Aisha: “And why, when you heard it, did you not say, ‘It is not for us to speak of this. Exalted are You, [O Allah]; this is a great slander?'” (Qur’an, 24:16)

If that doesn’t work, another thing that one could do is to change the subject and talk about something that would be more important.

Another scenario emerges: what if someone comes to tell you something they have heard? The Prophet (s) was put in that same situation, and his response was,

“Let no one among you convey to me what is said about me (in terms of what will give rise to bad feelings in my heart). For indeed I love to come out to you with a pure and clean heart (without having negative feelings about any of you as a result of knowing what you said about me).” (Tirmidhi)

The Prophet (s) did not want to know. He closed all the doors to enmity and bad thoughts about people by telling them that he did not want to hear it.

As a final solution, one should ideally get up and leave, not to seclude oneself, but rather to avoid hearing poisonous talk that would affect our hearts and encourage us to join in. Even the Companions used to say, “[O Allah,] protect my sight and my hearing!”

We must remember that the Prophet (s) was an example of upright character even before he received revelation, rejecting many of the normal practices of the ignorant Arabs. He was known as as-Sadiq (the Truthful), al-Ameen (the Trustworthy). His beautiful character was why our mother Khadija, his first wife, was so drawn to him.

Sincerity and Allah’s Name Ash-Shakoor (The Appreciative)

Some of us, while reading the above, may feel nervous. It’s already a struggle not to join in the backbiting; is even harder to try to stop it or leave when it happens. Yet Allah told us, “…and whoever commits a good deed – We will increase for him good therein. Indeed, Allah is Forgiving and Appreciative” (Qur’an, 42:23).

Especially when a situation is hard for us, Allah appreciates and rewards us generously for our efforts in persevering. In one incident, `Aisha was going to perform `umrah (the lesser pilgrimage) with the Prophet (s), and there was difficulty in performing the task. So the Prophet (s) told her, “The reward is according to your expenses or the hardship (which you will undergo while performing it).” (Bukhari)

In Islam, we are not meant to make things more difficult for ourselves. However, if we find ourselves in a situation that is trying, then we must know that Allah is with us and will reward us accordingly for our struggles. Therefore, with these situations that require patience and perseverance, we must know that following the example of the Prophet (s) and putting our trust in Allah will not be wasted, insha’Allah (God-willing).