Comments on: How do We Deal with Domestic Abuse?

By: nourradiance

nourradiance — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 08:48:19 +0000

We all have our weaknesses, men and women. Allah gives us our deen to help us overcome our weaknesses including anger and tyranny. I am reminded of a woman, who belongs to the highest Jannah, Asiyah when she supplicated to Allah SWT:
“My Lord! Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from the Firaun/Pharaoh and his work, and save me from the Zalimun.” (Quran: Tahrim,66:11)

By: Ihssan

Ihssan — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 02:56:43 +0000

Thanks for posting this. One step towards confronting that Muslims have domestic abuse issues means that we are a step closer to trying to fix them.
-Ihssan

By: d

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 21:31:24 +0000

thank god for the three people above who were not narrow minded enough to just dismiss it as a “non islamic problam” do not allow yourselves to be blinded against the reality of the world. the unfortunate thing is that, maybe it is more hidden in islamic communities maybe that is why some people think it is less common. or maybe because it SHOULD be less common some people might believe it to all ready be so. there is an amazingly big drug and alcohol problam in islamic comunities too. as i am sure any youth worker or womens issues worker will be able to inform us. may allah help all involved in such situations, and give them the strength and belief to carry on.

By: umm pookie

umm pookie — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 16:46:15 +0000

It’s very common in the Muslim community. And if we are thinking that because many times there is alcohol involved, we are less prone, then think again, because alcohol and other substance abuse is common in our communities too.

Islam is medicine, but only if people actually take it as prescribed. That includes those of us who enter it later in their lives, as well as those of us who grew up with it. So the solution by itself is not for people to be or become Muslim, people still have to be committed to getting rid of their issues and baggage.

By: ****

**** — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 15:47:15 +0000

Believe it or not it is a huge problem in the muslim community, most certainly here in the uk. Majority of the time it is not alcohol related.
Why does it happen if its not alcohol related? Because of power. To show they are superior physically and mentally.
This situation is worst among those women who come from ‘back home’ and don’t speak a word of English.

There was a case earlier on this year where the in-laws where convicted of manslaughter of their daughter-in-law: even though they had no direct involvement. The reason being is because they allowed their son to commit horrific acts of violence against her. They did not intervene in any way – just turned a blind eye to it, even when she was lying there dying.

My suggestion would be to set up women’s organisation that provides activities for women to do. Once you’ve established a reputable name for the organisation: the women will know who you are and can trust you – you will then have a platform to reach to these vulnerable women. So one day when they get the courage to seek help, they will know who to turn to.

By: Zubair Khan

Zubair Khan — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 05:57:27 +0000

That is a pretty sad and unfortunate reality here in the US, albeit I would hope/pray that it’s not as bad in the Muslim community (if I’m not mistaken, a lot of the times alcohol is involved in domestic abuse cases?). The best way I can think of to prevent that from happening (especially in the Muslim community) is to present the role model of the Prophet (sw) and work with people at the grass-roots level to help them get closer to Allah (swt). If someone tries to follow the example of the Prophet (sw), how can they even think about raising a hand on a woman?

But how do we help those who are going through it in non-Muslim families? I really can’t think of any other way of us being able to help the situation other than spreading the message of Islam. That should really motivate us to step up our game. Alhumdulillah, Islam removes all of these problems from the community. Since we have this beautiful way of life with us, shouldn’t we not be selfish and try to benefit as many people as we can with it?

By: River

River — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 20:14:43 +0000

Those of you that are going thru this, Allah is aware of your situation where ever you are… His angels are your gaurdians as they watching and writing and the wreckoning will come swiftly inshAllah upon them who beat their wives, their limbs will weaken one day and they will look back at what they did in awe and they will then be at the mercy of their fate. What a waste. I admit , i am guilty of this anger but i never put my hands on a women Alhamdullilah. But still, it is this anger that comes from the inner core of your heart, from somewhere and if we dont use Quran to heal the wounds our anger will destroy us in this life and the next. I seek refuge with Ar Rahman from this anger, it will eat you alive and burn you in the next life. We want so much from this life and feel that we deserve it and when we dont get it we become angry with Allah and ourselves and this is what leads to the hard sick heart, like leaches sucking the good from your heart. We should remember that we dont deserve anything we have and especially the mercy of Allah, but it is out of his gratitude to us and i dont know why but He still gives us. Alhamdulliah , SubahanAllah, AstagfirullAllah.