Many of us pray for the perfect spouse and imagine him or her being a certain way. Sometimes, what we pray for becomes most apparent in difficult times. In this account, a wife talks about the ways in which real life has helped her and her husband grow in their beautiful relationship.

Photo: Danna

“My husband and I are from two different worlds literally and figuratively, and the thing that binds us together the most is Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala – exalted is He) and our undeniable faith in Him (swt). After looking in America for two years, I decided to marry someone from “back home,” i.e. Pakistan. When we first got married, we realized what a huge adjustment it would be for both of us. We had kids right away when he came. He went to school here and got his degree from here, and I supported him financially all during the time that I was a new mother and the only thing I wanted to do was raise my precious firstborn full-time.

Under such circumstances many marriages rightfully take a back seat and the relationship crumbles. We had many big fights over those first few years. Every time we fought I made du`a’ (supplication) to Allah (swt) to make it better, and He did. Our fights never lasted more than a day, and one of us always ended up saying sorry. We couldn’t go to sleep without making up. Throughout our good times and hard times I discovered that I married a very caring and generous man. I also discovered that I needed to accept him for who he was and that I had many bad qualities that needed to be worked out if I was going to stand in front of my Creator on the Day of Judgment. His love for me is shown in always hiding my faults in front of others, in picking flowers for me on the way home from the masjid, in taking care of the kids and giving me some time off, in cleaning up a messy house and in always sharing with me his day to day dealings at work or with his friends. As time has passed we have gotten closer and now I can’t imagine not having him in my life. The kids have really served to bond us together and it warms my heart when our eldest wants to pray because he sees his father praying. Alhamdullilah (praise be to God)!

My husband is not perfect and has many faults, but I know inside there is a light of goodness that gets dim at times and at times shines brightly, and I am committed to stand by him throughout all those times. I used to make du`a’ to Allah (swt) for a pious, kind, gentle husband and now that Allah (swt) has given me a slave of His to love, I must remain thankful, for if I am thankful He will give me more. We just celebrated our five-year wedding anniversary, and I look forward to spending many more with him insha’ Allah (God-willing).”

Rain continues to fall and flooding is expected to worsen, as officials now estimate that more than 14 million people have been affected by severe flooding and landslides in northwest Pakistan.

A senior United Nations official said the scale of Pakistan’s floods is worse than the 2004 tsunami in Asia and this year’s earthquake in Haiti.

Islamic Relief workers are helping in the evacuation effort, administering aid, and helping serve thousands of flood victims, but the need is still immense.

Shortages of food, water, clothing, shelter, and supplies are making it difficult for the victims. Waterborne diseases like diarrhea and cholera have contaminated nearly all the water wells and the deadly diseases are beginning to infect the most vulnerable of the people. Children are especially at risk.

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After devastating Pakistan-administered Kashmir and the Khyber-Pakhtunkhwa (KPK) province, floodwaters are now affecting areas of Punjab and Sindh.

Two million people are now homeless and more than 1,600 lives have been lost.
Flashfloods and landslides washed away entire villages and uprooted thousands of acres of farmland.

Due to the sheer magnitude of the rains, which caught most victims off-guard, many have lost their livelihoods and have no idea how they will survive after the disaster.

Islamic Relief USA’s Vice President of Programs, Adnan Ansari, is part of the IR team in Pakistan helping with aid efforts and assessing the needs of the people. He reported, “Outside the camps, many people were staying put in their villages, despite their homes being destroyed and the roads being cut off.  ‘This is all we have left,’ one of the victims who stayed home (which had no walls left) told me. ‘I can’t risk leaving my belongings unattended.'”

“People’s dreams were hit hard by the floods. But their ability to overcome the hardship is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit. Still I wonder how long they can hold up.”

More information @ Islamic Relief USA.

What else can we do?

• Du`a’. Pray for them.
• Donate food and clothing. There are organizations that are working to ship in-kind donations to Pakistan.
• Spread Awareness. This can be as simple as changing your Facebook status.
• Fundraise. If you’re on campus, have a bake sale or pass around a coin jar in your classes. Have a fast-a-thon to raise funds.
• Brainstorm. What else can we do? Share your ideas in the comments.